51 - wary update
Its like a scab that you cant help but pick at, you thought you were done with it. But it keeps coming back, or is that the cat came back...? who cares lol
This is about that weekend guy...remember?... I wish I didnt lol No Ill save my wishes for something more important :) Its all a learning experience.. Im still learning from this one. I am.
Ok so update on that. He called after about ... I dont know since end of June?? I was shocked to hear his voice. I didnt hang up. I was polite if a little wary. Even I could hear the wariness in my voice. He mentioned an email that I had sent and that he thought I was really classy about it all. So much has happened and he would like to talk if I still wanted to talk to him.
Something in me betrayed the rest. I should be felling pissed off, not looking forward to anything with hi, just all around unfeeling.. I wasnt, I was happy he called and wanted to talk. I could have talked to him then, but wouldnt that seem to eager? Plus I had a perfectly good lounge chair waiting for me by the pool and a fruity drink with an umbrella in it. Why do I want to make it so easy for him to have access to me?
It wasnt a good time so I told him that the evening would be better he said great, hed call me. I probably should have talked to him then because who knows if he would have called when he says he will. He didnt by the way. I have no idea what he wanted to talk to me about. Which left me thinking about... what he wanted to talk about. All sorts of things went through my mind really. I didnt have a clue as to what. Let down again. Now hes in my thoughts after working hard to ween myself off of him.
Why should I care? I just do. That is me... the one who cares. Someone stop me!
The familiar stuggle begins
This is about that weekend guy...remember?... I wish I didnt lol No Ill save my wishes for something more important :) Its all a learning experience.. Im still learning from this one. I am.
Ok so update on that. He called after about ... I dont know since end of June?? I was shocked to hear his voice. I didnt hang up. I was polite if a little wary. Even I could hear the wariness in my voice. He mentioned an email that I had sent and that he thought I was really classy about it all. So much has happened and he would like to talk if I still wanted to talk to him.
Something in me betrayed the rest. I should be felling pissed off, not looking forward to anything with hi, just all around unfeeling.. I wasnt, I was happy he called and wanted to talk. I could have talked to him then, but wouldnt that seem to eager? Plus I had a perfectly good lounge chair waiting for me by the pool and a fruity drink with an umbrella in it. Why do I want to make it so easy for him to have access to me?
It wasnt a good time so I told him that the evening would be better he said great, hed call me. I probably should have talked to him then because who knows if he would have called when he says he will. He didnt by the way. I have no idea what he wanted to talk to me about. Which left me thinking about... what he wanted to talk about. All sorts of things went through my mind really. I didnt have a clue as to what. Let down again. Now hes in my thoughts after working hard to ween myself off of him.
Why should I care? I just do. That is me... the one who cares. Someone stop me!
The familiar stuggle begins
posted by darling @ 10:14 PM
2 Comments:
At July 31, 2006 5:28 PM,
afrobev said…
Ooh mind games. Some blokes are really good at them. He is obviously up to something and I don't like the sound of it at all, but then I do have a very suspicious mind when it comes to other guys especially when they are so obviously just playing with people's emotions and feelings. I say forget about the loser. But then I am not you! x
At July 31, 2006 11:45 PM,
darling said…
Has someone made a book of all the mind games that people play? I wonder how that book would sell? lol
Im too nice. He did have emotions and feeling to manipluate. Not anymore. He cant play with what he doesnt have. :)
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