funnies
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in overall system performance - particularly in the
flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed
undesirable programs such as NHL 5.0, NBA 3.0. and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
the system.
I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed, Desperate
========================
Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind, that Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package,
while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
Please enter the command: "http/www.I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and
try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 5.0
update.
If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
But remember, over use of the above application can cause Husband 1.0
to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer
6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in
the background, that will eventually seize control of all your system
resources)!
Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are
unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 .
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider
buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We
recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck,
Tech Support
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Being single I have no idea how it is to be married. I wonder if a percentage of this is true. Its been said that every joke has some truth in it. So for those of you who are married, is there some truth to the above? :)
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
distinct slow down in overall system performance - particularly in the
flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs,
such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed
undesirable programs such as NHL 5.0, NBA 3.0. and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes
the system.
I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed, Desperate
========================
Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind, that Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package,
while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
Please enter the command: "http/www.I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and
try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 5.0
update.
If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
But remember, over use of the above application can cause Husband 1.0
to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer
6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in
the background, that will eventually seize control of all your system
resources)!
Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are
unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0 .
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider
buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We
recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck,
Tech Support
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Being single I have no idea how it is to be married. I wonder if a percentage of this is true. Its been said that every joke has some truth in it. So for those of you who are married, is there some truth to the above? :)
posted by darling @ 1:38 PM
8 Comments:
At January 20, 2007 3:35 PM,
Anonymous said…
Sadly it's far more true than any guy wants to admit.
At January 20, 2007 4:59 PM,
afrobev said…
Yeah, sounds a little too familiar for me. Very funny though :)
At January 20, 2007 9:38 PM,
George said…
I completely agree with the above comments but on the other hand girlfriend 5.0 is an application that morphs into wife 1.0 and ... let me put it this way ... girlfriend 5.0 runs on the Mac and wife runs on Windoze. Need I say more?
At January 21, 2007 12:22 AM,
the other person said…
well..seems like guys the world over really aren't that different. i freely admit :P.
hilarious
At January 21, 2007 1:01 AM,
Liza said…
With all due respect to the experiences of the other folks above, I am happy to report that it's not exactly this way. At least it isn't for me. The joke's funny because of the stereotypical male and female roles it describes as programs.
When you find the right one, you'll find that gender roles don't matter as much. To quote Beck, "I want to defy/The logic of all sex laws..." As long as both parties are running Respect 1.0, it's all good.
Oh, and George, with all due respect, this is one Wife that definitely does not do Windoze!!!
^_^ Liza
At January 21, 2007 12:49 PM,
George said…
Good for you Liza
At January 21, 2007 1:01 PM,
Brewster said…
LOL Well, I don't think I have any of those viruses, but I will have to say that marriage is what you make of it. If you both put in the effort, then it is a wonderful thing, but when neither of you do, then it is miserable. I have had both sides of that equation. So...
It is funny, though, so thank you.
At January 22, 2007 3:56 PM,
darling said…
Ladies and Gentlemen,
Im glad you were amused. I wont use this as a sounding board for what to look for.
I agree with Liza and Brewster with it is what you make it and Im sure its not all the same :)
Maybe at times though it seems that way.
Glad things are different Liza :) We should all be so lucky!
Respect :) very important it is.
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