109 I love you too
A memory...
I was sent a package in the mail and received it and just put it away. When going through some boxes, I found it within some clothes. I didnt open the package until 3 years later on the exact day he wrote the letter below. I was baffled at the coincidence. I cried for what it meant, for what I lost, for what I was given.
I cried for the memories that flooded me, for the possibilities and for a future that will never come to pass.
I think of him from time to time, and wonder and the things he is up to, the work hes done, the life he now leads. I wonder if hes happy. I hope he is. I wanted to so much for him. I still do.
I wonder if he thinks of me too...and I also wonder if he knows that I loved him too...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
04/30/02
Hello Darling,
I know I have not been the kind of boyfriend you deserve. Neither one of us deserves to be apart for as long as we have. These last few months have been very difficult on the both of us. But until recently, I had changed the way I love you or rather seen a different side of love that I have for you.
I made too big of an issue of the obstacles that kept us separated, and in my own frustration I directed that anger towards you. Our relationship seems to have trouble whenever I lacked confidence in either me or you. I have forced that issue on you and have made you feel as though you were to blame.
Even with the things you have told me recently, I have come to realize just how deeply I am in love with you. My love is UNCONDITIONAL. Love, forgiveness and God are one in the same. You are my Angel. I have failed to keep you happy and in so failed to keep myself happy. Life teaches me different things everyday. I'm sorry I learned it the hard way when you have said it to me all along.
I love you
DMR
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I still love him and always will. He was a large part of my life. He is no longer, but the lessons, memories and experiences are there. I am because of him.
The love is different. No longer encompassing and heart wrenching, but my heart remembers what it was like. I love him for the person he is and the things he stands for and the things he will do in his life. Hes a good person and who doesnt love the good?
PS. Wherever you are DMR... All the best :)
I was sent a package in the mail and received it and just put it away. When going through some boxes, I found it within some clothes. I didnt open the package until 3 years later on the exact day he wrote the letter below. I was baffled at the coincidence. I cried for what it meant, for what I lost, for what I was given.
I cried for the memories that flooded me, for the possibilities and for a future that will never come to pass.
I think of him from time to time, and wonder and the things he is up to, the work hes done, the life he now leads. I wonder if hes happy. I hope he is. I wanted to so much for him. I still do.
I wonder if he thinks of me too...and I also wonder if he knows that I loved him too...
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
04/30/02
Hello Darling,
I know I have not been the kind of boyfriend you deserve. Neither one of us deserves to be apart for as long as we have. These last few months have been very difficult on the both of us. But until recently, I had changed the way I love you or rather seen a different side of love that I have for you.
I made too big of an issue of the obstacles that kept us separated, and in my own frustration I directed that anger towards you. Our relationship seems to have trouble whenever I lacked confidence in either me or you. I have forced that issue on you and have made you feel as though you were to blame.
Even with the things you have told me recently, I have come to realize just how deeply I am in love with you. My love is UNCONDITIONAL. Love, forgiveness and God are one in the same. You are my Angel. I have failed to keep you happy and in so failed to keep myself happy. Life teaches me different things everyday. I'm sorry I learned it the hard way when you have said it to me all along.
I love you
DMR
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I still love him and always will. He was a large part of my life. He is no longer, but the lessons, memories and experiences are there. I am because of him.
The love is different. No longer encompassing and heart wrenching, but my heart remembers what it was like. I love him for the person he is and the things he stands for and the things he will do in his life. Hes a good person and who doesnt love the good?
PS. Wherever you are DMR... All the best :)
Labels: Xmemories
posted by darling @ 10:59 AM
6 Comments:
At November 10, 2006 12:35 PM,
George said…
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
At November 10, 2006 1:56 PM,
afrobev said…
Sometimes when you love someone you have to let them go. You have done that and it can be the hardest thing, excrutiating at times but it needs to be done.
Keep your chin up kid and don't let the bastards get you down. Love and peace Darling :0)
At November 10, 2006 3:39 PM,
darling said…
Hmm thats a first, a deleted comment.
Hi James,
:) It was neat going back in time for a moment. I guess thats what the past few posts have been. Bringing me to the past.
I was a different person then. I see some similarities between the then me and the now me. Mostly for the better and hopefully wiser.
Love and peace James :)
At November 10, 2006 8:40 PM,
George said…
Darling ... I deleted my own post. I was advised by somebody I care for and respect that it was too harsh and written without me actually knowing what lead to those letters being written.
At November 12, 2006 8:37 PM,
Anonymous said…
Reliving the past. It's hard to not go there when one has loved and lost. I find myself sometimes doing it too.
Ever look at an old person's face though? They have been through SO much more hurt than you and I have.
Just by looking at their faces it easy to pick out the gentle-hearted from the "Grumpy Old Men"
In times of hurt....be better, not bitter.
At November 13, 2006 11:34 AM,
darling said…
Hi George,
Its always difficult looking in from the outside. Its ok. Everyone has an opinion on everything :) Im sure it wasnt bad at all. :) Feel free to re post your comment Im sure other readers are curious about it :)
Hello Anonymous,
Ive often done that, look at people and see a world of experiences and situations I will never have a glimpse of.
Wise words from someone unknown :)
Always better not bitter.
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