187 - missing

Ive become the girl that's having the time of her life. I do what I want to, when I want to, because I want to. I don't have a roommate to argue with over whose turn it is to do the dishes. I don't have a roommate that tells me I'm not spending enough time with them. I don't have a roommate that borrows my clothes, car et al. I don't have a boyfriend to call during the day to talk to and hear their voice. I don't have a boyfriend who will leave me to my lonesome on boys night outs. I don't have a boyfriend telling me how to maintain my car. I don't have a husband that watches where I spend my money. I don't have a husband who expects dinner when he gets home. I don't have a husband who leaves their clothes on the floor.

Ive become the girl that's having the time of her life. I do what I want to when I want to because I want to. I don't have a roommate to share chores so I have to do it all. I don't have a roommate that cares whether I spend time with them or not. I don't have a roommate whose clothes/car I can borrow. I don't have a boyfriend who calls me wondering what I am up to. I don't have a boyfriend to miss when hes out with his boys. I don't have a boyfriend whose voice Id want to hear during the day. I don't have a boyfriend to remind me to get an oil change. I don't have a husband who will appreciate what I spend my money on. I don't have a husband to pick up take out when I don't feel like cooking. I don't have a husband to pick after me when I leaves clothes on the floor.

The only thing that remains constant is that Ive become the girl that's having the time of her life. I do what I want to because I want to.

I care about people and what happen to them. I am generous with my time, money and am an all around nice person that's been pretty lucky that I haven't had horrible experiences in most areas of my life. I chalk that up to treating people well and hopefully allows the The Powers That Be to look upon me kindly.

No matter whats happening or not happening in my life. It is my life and I am glad for it. It could be worse. Much worse. So, for the things that bother me about what is happening or what is not happening. I tell myself it can always be worse. Enjoy what I have. Other people would salivate over my life, others I am sure would scoff. Me? I just live it.

What more does a person need? I have my health, jobs enough for 2 people, cars that are paid for, no debt, zero balance on my plastic friends and investments that are slowly growing. Dogs that are happy to see me no matter what, family that I can laugh and joke with, girlfriends that I relax and have fun with, men to play and argue with, a world to explore and secrets that would make some people blush...

With all that, there are days when it feels like something is missing.