185 - smiling

K came over. We spoke on the phone prior to his arrival and he mentioned that he was nervous as there was a strong attraction and he felt threatened. I told him if he wanted to feel threatened Id walk around in a hoody with a fake knife making slashing noises (eee eee eee), jump out of closets and the like. He laughed. He also mentioned that there was the level of intimacy we've established and that he was a bit cautious about it.

I told him it would be different and possibly share a bottle of wine and talk freely like we have been, laughed little bit and learn something. No pressure. I told him that as much as I was anticipating getting together. I wasn't going to assume that anything will happen as just the opposite may.

He knocks on my door and I think both of us were pleasantly surprised. Sometimes you just dont know what to expect on the other side of the door.

After a while of wine and great topics of conversation, he leans over and kisses me. A nice introductory kiss. Not too much force and with a tease of his tongue. We both smile and continue the conversation. I ask him if he would like a tour of my apartment and I give him the 25 cent tour which ends in my bedroom. He sits on my bed and comments on its firmness and how he prefers that to ones where you sink in too much.

I sit on the corner a little unsure of myself for a moment but not of what might happen in the next little while. He leans in again and kisses me. Takes my glass and places them both on the side table. We kiss and caress until he presses me against the bed.

Hours later, after windows are opened to cool us both down, wine glasses empty. He sits up and rubs my back in a rhythmic motion that almost puts me to sleep. He leans down and kisses my forehead, I smile and he gets up and dresses himself. When hes almost finished I get up and pull the dress back over my head.

He kisses my cheek and then my lips softly and leaves for home.

Now the strange part of any night I am with anyone is the part when they turn and walk out my door. I'm conflicted with thoughts of what they are thinking. Whether its good bad, full or sorrow or joy that they are leaving. I know, thoughts that aren't and shouldn't be connected after something orgasmic occurs.

I'm strange sometimes, and cant control where thoughts go. No matter they are thoughts and I entertain them for a few moments and then remind myself that I need sleep as it is late and after brushing my teeth and washing my face. I crawl into bed and snuggle into the bed under the warm duvet and fall asleep knowing that I have a smile on my face.