143 - lesser or two evils

I get out of my car and see a man with 2 young children. I dont dare guess their ages. Im just thanking my lucky stars I dont have any at this time.

I lock my doors and walk away towards the bank. Theres something sinister about the night and the darkness sometimes.

'Hi, How are you? Long time no see!'

Shit I do know him. Do I? Im hoping hes talking to someone else. Nope hes talking t me. Great! This was bound to happen sooner or later. 'Hi how are you?' (I stand around awkwardly, planning an escape route. Look left to right and will the ground to open and swallow him up not me)

(sigh) Tap my foot impatiently on the ground. I hear 'good good, get in the car you two. In now!' I think thats too bad, keep them out so they can distract you and make you want to just get home or wherever it is you seem to have come from that outfitted you in something shiny and blue.

My thought continues and wonders why the world brings people to me when Its specifically people that I try not to be around. I seem to have this sick twisted luck. Someone up there likes to play with Darlings life. Its not the good fin kind of play either.

'So dont I get a hug?... (Im thinking huh? well... ok why not. I be my polite well brought up lady like self and do the double kiss which gets his attention and right away I think WRONG!! Shouldnt have initiated any form of touching. I did the kiss kiss thing that I have to rethink...

He isnt satisfied with that so he pulls me in, Im taken aback with the shock that it was such a wrong thing for me to do the double kiss to THIS guy, that, catching me off guard he reaches around me and palms my ass in his what I am sure was a greasy palm. AND he squeezes! Not the nice kind either. He squeezes as if hes making up for lost time...

Maybe like an old great aunt would if she hadnt seen you in years because she has very very thick glasses and calls you a different name other than what you were given at birth? Have one of those? Instead of her squeezing your ass its your cheek? That kind of feeling. (cringe)

So yeah. Im even more shocked now that he touched me in a way that was not expected much less wanted!

(inhale) This boy will self destruct in 3 blinks... blink... blink... blinks... waiting gleefully for combustion and sparks. Nothing. The world is not on my side this night.

'So, what have you been up to?'I hear myself saying in a tone that doesnt solicit more conversation. 'Just working and yeah I just got off work and im here with the kids... shopping. Do you live nearby?

Sirens of all sorts start going off in my head and I think 'Darling, you could say no, youre just in the neighborhood to use the bank. What comes out of my mouth. I look at my house, and a brilliant thing ... my hand goes up and waves in the opposite direction and say ' nearby yes, you?'

Why do I keep talking?!?!?! And what has happened to my legs??! Why arent they walking away?!

Someone would be slapping me now (not to mention earlier, and about a few months ago if my life were a cartoon)

Victory!! I didnt tell him my house was in visual distance (I allow myself a silent snicker... not the chocolate bar, the he he he kind)

So he tells me that hes thought of me a lot and wants to know if Im still in the same place.(work) LIE! 'No im not', wow that was easy! 'Oh where are you working now?' Im working downtown now. HA try to find me.

FLASHBACK of man who found me at work by calling number after number in the phonebook. My triumph is shortlived with that memory

'Well I never got your number that time. Id like to have it' hmmmm really dont want to, know I wont give it to him so I just say 'Hmmm, no' This does not deter this man. 'Well it would be nice to have it so I can call you. I had a lot of fun and want to get together. You know how I like to be adventurous.' Like THAT is going to get me excited about giving him my number.

Im thinking... Come on memory... was there enough of him to be adventurous?!? Cant have been as I declined 90% of the things he suggested that time. Its ALL crashing back in waves and Im being pushed back with the 'ick ' of it all.

First let me say he was dressed in a bright blue track suit. At 10pm!!! I have nothing against bright blue tracksuits. I do have something against them when people wear them IN PUBLIC! and its so not a good idea when youre trying to pick up someone that you might have been in a questionable situation with.

Its a big NO. Do Not Pass Go. Do Not collect 200$ Get thee to the jailhouse! Well I wasnt impressed with anything at this encounter... And please dont even think or mention what could have brought me to unsaid questionable situation involving bright blue tracksuit wearing man.

Well, back to unfortunate incident of the night, 'why dont I get your number?' errr 'well I think we see each other enough that we dont need it.'

Remind me to post about my annoyance with how Ibump into people that I culd really do without seeing as often as I do.

Its time to end this freaky chapter of the day, 'Well Ive got to go, Im running late' He says 'Hey are you married?' I should have said yes, but something tells me that that answer wouldnt have done anything to disuade him from his goal. The goal in this case being me (sigh) sadly.

'Uh, no Im not, but Ive got to go' I turn to walk away and leave him with a 'take care' and under my breath I slap my thigh and chastise myself for getting into things that bring me to situations like that. I mutter how strange and keet muttering until I walk in front of a car whose occupants stare at me as I talk to myself. (oops)

Silently!

Ok so I do my banking and in the middle of it I lean back far enough over the side walls of privacy to peek and see if his minivan is still around. Nope gonzo! YES!

I finish up and walk out to my car. Start it and think what an odd night. I hope someone up there is having a good laugh. :) I think what a story this would make when I tell my girlfriends. Another classic Darling tale for sure.

So I drive out and Since I dont live too far from that bank Im home in 1.5 minutes from where I was parked. I check out my rearview mirror and see a white Jeep, right on my tail. Jacka$$! Oh well Im home. I dont need anymore strange occurences for the night.

I pull into my driveway and the Jeep pulls up in my neighbors lane and I think 'Thank goodness I didnt do anything' Its good to be home after a long day. I get out of the car and GUESS WHO WALKS OUT OF THE JEEP?!

Damn. He does live nearby too! OMG yuck. This has gone too far. Im pretty annoyed now and just look at him over my car and ask 'what are you doing?' he starts apologizing right away about how he thought I might have seen him flash his higbeams at me and he thought that I was pulling over for him (as if) 'Err no I wasnt. Why would I want to do that? I thought I made it clear that I didnt want anything with you tonight?'

'Well yeah but I thought we could talk for a little while. I dropped off the kids and came right back and I thought if I saw you it was meant to be' The idea of fate does funny things to people. This is not funny. Im freaked out that he knows where I live.

'Look tonights just not a good night, I am not looking for anything and its kind of freaky that you followed me home. He starts to protest that he didnt know it was home I was pulling into. 'Whatever' I cut him off. Look really its strange.

He goes off about how hes not a crazy stalker/crazy/weird guy. He would never come here without my permission. OMG like that would ever happen!

He also says that he knows he looks bad dressed the way he is and the way hes sporting a 5 o clock shadow (more like a 2 day shadow to me) He says that usually women are running after him. Im about to laugh in his face. He obviously doesnt know me but wants to. He corrects himself as he just realized how pompous he sounds. Making excuses about not looking good and timing just being bad and and and...

I dont spend more time with him. He just asks me again for my number and I say no. I just turned and walked away saying Ive got to go.

Inside my house. Im freaking out.

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(thats me freaking out)

Buts its helping to have written about it. Kinda damn funny actually. So I sit here typing all this out and Im hoping that you have all been amused by one or two things in this post.

So the lesser of two evils... give the poor guy a number, any number, that should satisfy him for the time being. Its better then him knowing where I live. Does it have to be my number? He could very well enjoy a pizza when hes connected. (giggles)

No worries. I know I have a reason to be freaked out as he knows where I live. BUT this isnt where Ill be living in the near future (wink)

Im moving remember... which is another update that is coming.