238 - girly moments

I worked another FIFA double header. Not as much fun as the first one I worked. Not as much money either. That's OK. It was on a weekend like the first one. This Friday night is when I work FIFA again. Ive been told that it will be a huge night and It will be much better than last night.

After working I went to meet up with some friends to play pool and have some drinks. I had on a skirt and the red shirt they have us wear for FIFA. I took that off, the shirt that is and replaced it with a halter top.

Much fun and flirting with other pool players later. I could tell I was a bit off on my rocker as I was pretty touchy feely. Giving out hugs and being picked up and twirled in the air. Which I enjoy. No kissing. No lip lock. No sexual contact with the opposite sex. Though I had many fleeting thoughts of how that might happen on and around the pool tables.

I'm home. Just before 2am and feeling a little sexually repressed, send a text message. I know I know. It wasn't even a booty text :) It went as follows.

'Its late. I miss you. I shouldn't even send this but oh well. Feel free to pay this no mind. '

WTF was I thinking? I know that the feel good sexual feelings that I have are clouding the other parts of my brain making me think its an actual relationship but WTF?! I should know better. I just should.

Earlier that same day I send a text message after we spend lunch together and it went along the lines of...

' even after all the sex this past weekend with you, I'm still looking forward to the next time. Should I tone it down a bit?'

Why? Why would I send texts like that? Well let me tell you. I have moments where I am a girl. Where I think like a girl and want to know things a girl wants to know. Like...

-Does he like me
-I wonder what he likes about me
-Would tantric sex work?
-Why don't we cuddle more?
- yada yada yada and beyond!!

Its not a relationship. I know that. I remind myself of that daily. Do I want more? Yes do I want more? No. I don't want more. Whats wrong with that? Everything. If I say I want more then I could possibly just end things or put him off. Not to mention I wont be able to partake in The Soup anymore.

Am I willing to give up The Soup for one person? Ill come off sounding like a complete (fill in the blank) But no, at the moment I'm not able to.

Thought process...

- how can I make him give up his guacamole dip to just be with me, if he has one?
- I don't think I can just be with one person who can satisfy this, that and the other.
- I'm sure it happens when you find a person that satisfies most of this that and the other
- I just haven't. Until then, Ill enjoy what I have on the go.
- As much as I want to believe that I am enough to satisfy everything for one man.
- I know that I'm great and all that wonderful jazz but sometimes people just want more
- how can I live up to someone wanting more than I am?
- I wouldn't make someone else do something that I wasn't willing to do myself.
- fair is fair
- Can we really find that one person who can satisfy us in all the ways were looking for?
...

Hes golfing today and I know hes been up since 6am. I know hes gotten the girly text that I sent early this morning and Ive yet to hear from him. This could be the start of the art of distancing oneself from someone that just crossed the line.

(blush) He just called. No reception where he was. He did get my text thought it was cute and said he was thinking of me too. We seem to be OK. He thinks I'm screening my calls as hes called 4 times and I didn't answer (I was napping and didn't have it on my person to feel it vibrate) so... he thinks I'm screening my calls thinking I gave my number out to some guy last night.

Could he be a tad jealous? Oh and I mentioned to him that Ill be going out tonight and he asks with an exasperated tone. Who are you going out with tonight? Which so made me smile. I told him the girls. I don't think he believes me :P Ill let him stew over that one.

Nope I don't give my number out... often LOL In fact speaking of numbers... guess whose number I did get? A- one Mr Consul General of Panama
B- PC Mr possible boarder for the second bedroom.

How would I get contacts such as these? Being at the right place at the right time.
A- Pouring muchos cervesas avec beaucoup de skill and flirtations.
B- Just walking up to someone and saying Hi.

I so need to learn how to speak Spanish I will borrow my sisters tapes.

Its never good practice to make a contact and not follow up with anything so Ill be hoping to break out of my shy shell and get things going or at least get some form of communications started to see why the world has brought us together at this time.


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Enter TM who calls me 3-4 times a day. He wants to have a long distance relationship but I just wont have that. Hes nice but not enough to put a halt in my daily shenanigans to be in a relationship that would be very lacking in the physical department.

Sweet man though. I don't always answer his calls. I let him know that I am busy and I am. I don't lie about that. But really... you guys should hear some of the messages that he leaves for me. Very kinky and depending on my mood a huge turn on.

I must say that whoever gets me after listening to his messages benefits greatly AHEM!!

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Happy Fourth of July Everyone :)

Be good!