252 - cat-like

I went out with my sister and her S.O yesterday. We did groceries together and then went out to eat at Outback Steakhouse which were not planning on going to any time soon or ever again for that matter. The food was OK. What were not going back for is the service. Really bad experience, the waitress took forever to come around and take our order, fill our drinks and just had a bad attitude overall.

I know good service because I provide it when I work and the end of someones time with me I know they are happy. We laugh, we joke, we flirt. I cant control the product that's in question but I can control me.

I felt like asking her how she does on tips. Probably ok but Id like to tell her shed make more if she changed her attitude. So no more Outback Steakhouse for the three of us. Go figure we try something new and end up not enjoying the experience. But we enjoyed our own company which was fabulous.

I got home and walked The Big Dog, took a shower, prepared lunch and snacks for the next day and took out the garbage. I was tired but kind of restless so I was just putting things away and getting things done sooner than later.

As soon as my head hit the pillow and I drew up the blanket to my chin I was out. I slept well and woke up without the alarm clock. I took The Bog Dog out a bit longer than I usually do in the morning. It was beautiful out. Not too hot, not too cold. The sun slowly peaking through clouds and it was quiet.

Inside my apartment after feeding the dog and making breakfast. I was running around with one heel on, changing from a black skirt and a dressy tube top to a sundress. I didn't think to pick something out the night before or think of what I would wear while I was out with The Big Dog.

Oh did I mention we were cruising around town in an 86 Cadillac? I sat n the back seat and felt little. It was plush and comfy. And selling for $3000.00 If it weren't so bad on gas mileage Id have taken it but I can only drive one car at a time so I'm not a big fan of letting things sit. It was fun to drive around in it.

We got many comments wherever we went which was fun. I even told D about it. Its in really good shape. Driven by a little old lady who didn't take it out in the winter. Shes decided to move to a retirement home and doesn't need the car anymore hence the car being for sale.

I wasn't planning on going out yesterday but did anyway. It was good to go out but I know I would have enjoyed staying in for some rest and relaxation as well. Plenty of time to fit everything in.

I think this weekend.. other then the Casino night that's planned for Saturday. It will be spent relaxing. Again nothing else is planned other than going to the Casino but if something should come up then my weekend plans will change.

Ohh I have to mention watching the movie Bogeyman. It scares me. Ive been watching the DVD now for about 4 days and Ive been watching it in installments of 15-20 minutes or so. I can only handle that much per day otherwise Ill be a wimp for a while.

This way I enjoy the movie and I am able to watch it by myself while my dinner is heating up. My sister laughed at me when I told her. Its OK. I laughed at myself too for the ingenious idea. Now I was also thinking of inviting someone over to watch it with me but then I know Id miss the movie because I would want to distract myself from the horror with the body beside me :)

When I'm alone and to distract myself from being way too involved in the movie I'm on the floor doing sit ups or some sort of exercise that keeps me on the floor and off of the edge of the seat and from biting my nails.

Well that's enough about me being a scaredy(sic) cat.

248 - foul mood

Calling myself all sorts of stupid and anything idiotic today. Ive put myself in a foul mood. Foul Mood. FOUL MOOD.

The only way Ill feel better is to spend a whole lot of money to make it right. To make me feel better and to continue the life that I lead... normally. or as close to normal as I can manage.

Did I...

Option A - Get preggers. EEK!

Option B - Get arrested for indecent exposure. OK maybe not quite arrested... more like a slap on the bum for being so.. cheeky HA!

Option C - Drop my phone in the pool. Resuscitation was futile. There is no life in this phone.

So yeah I'm in a foul mood. Even morning sex couldn't take the cloud of frustration away. I'm sad, having all sorts of moments of self depreciation over a phone. Somethings wrong with me. Its my addiction other than doing the mambo horizontally.

I just want to crawl under the covers and sleep... in hopes of waking up beside a brand spanking new or same (but working) cell phone. If only it were that easy right?

Ill be heading to the cell phone place where I got it. Ive only had it since May 26th 2007. I'm hoping that Ill be able to get it sent out to be... blow dried? I mean what else can they do with it? I'm not sure what they can do or if it is even possible to be repaired... from water damage.

Well I guess this is the first CDA that Ive given it away in the same post what the answer was. I'm just too distraught. Overly. So much that I'm even considering asking for a hug. (sigh) Any takers? A nice solid hug, with arms that are strong, comforting and comfortable. I like hugs. By the by, I also wanted to make sure it was clear what my adventure was and that there are no big takers on Options A and B.

I need a hug. I'm tired and feel sappy.

Waking up at 430am for morning sex doesn't agree with me.. anymore. I'm not used to it since Ds schedule changed and were having less sex than before. I just want to go back to bed after work... Am I that lucky??

Nooooo... Today I have to meet... (draws a blank... doesn't want to confuse with tomorrows date...) Oh yes. I have a date with (thinks again to confirm if I'm thinking of the right person..)

Oh yes the date tonight is with B2 or is it B3? B2 I believe. Different names... it just happens to start with the same letter... Giving them numbers would just seem... wrong in a certain camp kind of way. (That's it for the negative connotation in this paragraph)

B2, coffee tonight. J, coffee tomorrow night. Incidentally, they are both at the same location. I'm not sure if that's the smartest thing for me to have done. Make it at the same place. I was thinking of going to a watering hole down the way but Ive already exhausted that location and I'm sure the waitresses think I must be the most popular thing since sliced bread. So I decided to give that place a break. Its one thing to go to the same place with the same people but if you go with different people all the time... well... you know.. Don't want anyone to get the wrong impression :)

I'm just a girl with a sometimes overbooked schedule.

OK so I had some spaghetti and I feel much better. Yes I made it. Not from scratch but it was still very good and Ive been told it tastes like it was made from scratch :) Made with love.. (awww)

Ive been told to let the phone dry out totally and bring it in to get replaced or repaired. I hope they can do that. Its been less than a year so its still under warranty. Lets hope shall we? I'm hoping it miraculously repairs itself and magically removes all charges for the rest of my life from its database LOL I know. I just want it to be OK and if its that bad then to get a new phone.

Ill be in withdrawals. I'm scared to find out how I will be without it. On my person everyday 24 hours, 7 days a week.

Don't worry... I have a backup :) When a girl knows her weakness.. she always makes sure theres a backup (wink)

Hope you all had a great weekend. Will catch up more later...

241 - additions

I'm thinking in my head that this is something that needs to be dealt with. Its something that I cant have looming up at me in the middle of the day. I blame D. No, I cant, its not all his fault. He was just the trigger. He started this all with an orgasm. Now I want more.

Hes not able to. Give me more that is. So I'm left to my own devices... and quite frankly I don't want to be left with my devices. Time to bring in The Soup. This is why The Soup exists :)

I had to go run a couple of errands and then had planned on meeting with J. Who called to reschedule. ARGGHH!! That's OK. Hes working on opening up his pool and wanted to get it all done in one day. I was invited to use it anytime. I wonder if he decided to open his pool because he heard about my bikini that I wanted to use and have yet to. That couldn't be it.

I put myself under house arrest when I got home. Kind of climbed the walls for a little while. meditated but all I had in my mind were images of me in various positions with blissful expressions on my face. Meditation didn't help. So I put on some music and danced. Soon I noticed that stripper like songs were coming on and that just reminded me of nakedness.

I indulged in some moves that didn't involve a pole and laughed at myself. Still it was a good time. Maybe one day ill have that pole.

I played tug of war with The Big Dog. I win. I always win. Cant have her win otherwise she gloats :) I spent some time with The Little One. Shes not doing so well anymore. For a while she was doing very well. The eye drops and ear ointment seem to have helped a lot. But other things are coming up and shes not looking as happy.

The quality of life has gone down and its time. Really. I'm glad to have has this extra time with her. Its been great. My brother has been spending more time with her as well and has also noticed the decline.

I though to myself if I was in her position what would I want. To go.

Playing with the Little One took me out off of the train to orgasm and made me spend more time with them. Good times. Took some pictures. Told them secrets no one else knows. I know they wont tell anyone. I talked about this and that which helped get it off my chest and mind.

I tired them out and they both went to their beds which are side by side. I went to my room and slept.

Didn't want to get up this morning. Having a lazy day. Nap time for sure later on and then Casino night with a girlfriend and her dad. Should make for an interesting night.

D couldn't meet for lunch today. His dad is coming by to discuss a few things and plan some other things with him. Bummer. Maybe tonight after the casino? We shall see.

I sent K a text while I was in bed last and he called me back immediately. Caught up on things and made plans to meet this Friday night. Hes coming over with dinner. August is coming up fast so I think ill take advantage, I don't think he will mind. I'm also going to pick his male brain apart. He thinks its cute when I do and likes the way I think out loud when were together. Says it gives him an insight to me.

B is in TO until next week. I talked to him for a while too last night and we had a good conversation. We'll get together sometime when he returns. Maybe catch a movie. B called about an hour or so ago thinking I wouldn't answer. He was surprised to hear me answer and I think I flustered him a little bit. He wanted to find out how I slept last night and was planning on leaving me a message. Seeing as he was the last person I talked to. He called and interrupted my sleep which I told him he would pay dearly for. So he sang me a lullaby... well.. he started... didn't finish but he did lull me back to sleep. Bidding me sweet dreams. Nice voice.

So his call today was to let me know hes on his way to Alberta, has a meeting there and will be back in TO tonight. How man will travel. I told him I wasn't happy that I wasn't invited on the trip. Maybe next time he says. We shall see wont we. So when hes back in Ottawa he'll call me again. Looking forward to it B.

B1 is new. Not to be mistaken for B(above) He is interesting. They both are. But B1 is interesting with a twist. Wont go into details yet about him just yet. Ill let things settle first. Hes calling me tonight sometime to discuss when we can go for a drink. I think hes trying to be a 'good boy' and not upset me. It will be interesting with him.

I just called D and told him I was hit by the hornies. He growled something sexy in my ear which didn't help in the pooling dept. Oh how sweet it would have been to meet for a quickie. He thinks I'm constantly on the go. Both socially and sexually. He likes it but I get the feeling he doesn't like it at the same time. Oh well. Ill continue to do what I do.

We had a conversation about Las Vegas and how he wanted to go... I told him I wanted to go too... yes Ill admit I wanted him to ask me to go with him. (blush) He didn't. So I said that's OK Ill go with a friend who I have been meaning to go with for the longest time :) The time is coming. I hope. Should be fun.

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas... well... of course Ill blog about it. Don't you worry. Sharing is caring, right?!?

He mentioned going to a place where it might be better if I went with a boyfriend... and I said 'well seeing as I don't have one of those at the moment. I think Ill have to make it on my own' again.. I was fishing. Don't ask me what I was thinking. I was fishing and kind of wanted to find out what we are. Which I already know but I want to make sure by hearing it from him and all this just left me in the exact same place as I was before.

Right here :)

238 - girly moments

I worked another FIFA double header. Not as much fun as the first one I worked. Not as much money either. That's OK. It was on a weekend like the first one. This Friday night is when I work FIFA again. Ive been told that it will be a huge night and It will be much better than last night.

After working I went to meet up with some friends to play pool and have some drinks. I had on a skirt and the red shirt they have us wear for FIFA. I took that off, the shirt that is and replaced it with a halter top.

Much fun and flirting with other pool players later. I could tell I was a bit off on my rocker as I was pretty touchy feely. Giving out hugs and being picked up and twirled in the air. Which I enjoy. No kissing. No lip lock. No sexual contact with the opposite sex. Though I had many fleeting thoughts of how that might happen on and around the pool tables.

I'm home. Just before 2am and feeling a little sexually repressed, send a text message. I know I know. It wasn't even a booty text :) It went as follows.

'Its late. I miss you. I shouldn't even send this but oh well. Feel free to pay this no mind. '

WTF was I thinking? I know that the feel good sexual feelings that I have are clouding the other parts of my brain making me think its an actual relationship but WTF?! I should know better. I just should.

Earlier that same day I send a text message after we spend lunch together and it went along the lines of...

' even after all the sex this past weekend with you, I'm still looking forward to the next time. Should I tone it down a bit?'

Why? Why would I send texts like that? Well let me tell you. I have moments where I am a girl. Where I think like a girl and want to know things a girl wants to know. Like...

-Does he like me
-I wonder what he likes about me
-Would tantric sex work?
-Why don't we cuddle more?
- yada yada yada and beyond!!

Its not a relationship. I know that. I remind myself of that daily. Do I want more? Yes do I want more? No. I don't want more. Whats wrong with that? Everything. If I say I want more then I could possibly just end things or put him off. Not to mention I wont be able to partake in The Soup anymore.

Am I willing to give up The Soup for one person? Ill come off sounding like a complete (fill in the blank) But no, at the moment I'm not able to.

Thought process...

- how can I make him give up his guacamole dip to just be with me, if he has one?
- I don't think I can just be with one person who can satisfy this, that and the other.
- I'm sure it happens when you find a person that satisfies most of this that and the other
- I just haven't. Until then, Ill enjoy what I have on the go.
- As much as I want to believe that I am enough to satisfy everything for one man.
- I know that I'm great and all that wonderful jazz but sometimes people just want more
- how can I live up to someone wanting more than I am?
- I wouldn't make someone else do something that I wasn't willing to do myself.
- fair is fair
- Can we really find that one person who can satisfy us in all the ways were looking for?
...

Hes golfing today and I know hes been up since 6am. I know hes gotten the girly text that I sent early this morning and Ive yet to hear from him. This could be the start of the art of distancing oneself from someone that just crossed the line.

(blush) He just called. No reception where he was. He did get my text thought it was cute and said he was thinking of me too. We seem to be OK. He thinks I'm screening my calls as hes called 4 times and I didn't answer (I was napping and didn't have it on my person to feel it vibrate) so... he thinks I'm screening my calls thinking I gave my number out to some guy last night.

Could he be a tad jealous? Oh and I mentioned to him that Ill be going out tonight and he asks with an exasperated tone. Who are you going out with tonight? Which so made me smile. I told him the girls. I don't think he believes me :P Ill let him stew over that one.

Nope I don't give my number out... often LOL In fact speaking of numbers... guess whose number I did get? A- one Mr Consul General of Panama
B- PC Mr possible boarder for the second bedroom.

How would I get contacts such as these? Being at the right place at the right time.
A- Pouring muchos cervesas avec beaucoup de skill and flirtations.
B- Just walking up to someone and saying Hi.

I so need to learn how to speak Spanish I will borrow my sisters tapes.

Its never good practice to make a contact and not follow up with anything so Ill be hoping to break out of my shy shell and get things going or at least get some form of communications started to see why the world has brought us together at this time.


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Enter TM who calls me 3-4 times a day. He wants to have a long distance relationship but I just wont have that. Hes nice but not enough to put a halt in my daily shenanigans to be in a relationship that would be very lacking in the physical department.

Sweet man though. I don't always answer his calls. I let him know that I am busy and I am. I don't lie about that. But really... you guys should hear some of the messages that he leaves for me. Very kinky and depending on my mood a huge turn on.

I must say that whoever gets me after listening to his messages benefits greatly AHEM!!

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Happy Fourth of July Everyone :)

Be good!