296 - Give me more

BC wants to see me again before he leaves. That's nice. Ill have to try to rearrange my schedule as its pretty busy the next few days. I know hes leaving this Sunday morning so I'm thinking the only time Ill have will be for Saturday early afternoon.

Before the Christmas Party that J1 puts on every year. The memo came out saying.

To: All Employees

From: The Head Poncho (name withheld for obvious reasons)

This year the Christmas Party will be held at 'La Di Da' (Not an actual place) which is located at 'Do Si Do' -sic- (Also not an actual address) It is near this road and that road. Which reminds me to map quest it so I know where Ill be going.

It will be held Saturday December 1 2007 at 7:00pm.

As usual it is necessary to obtain as soon as possible, the number of people which will attend in order to cater appropriately.

Please submit your intentions including your spouse or friend to your respective department managers.

Dress code will be smart business casual, no tie, no jeans, or tshirts.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My intentions is not to make out with my date who is my sister no matter how many people ask me to and no matter how much people offer us. That will just not do.

My intentions are to be a more accountable person and to be more disciplined in various areas of life.

Are these the kinds of intentions they are looking for?

Or would be along the lines of I intend not to sneak out of work early or make fun of other people.

What happens if peoples intentions are not honorable?

So they want me to dress like I normally do for work. Dropping my sexy. I think not. I can guarantee that I wont wear a tie, wont don a pair of jeans or be sporting a tshirt. That just gives me a mental picture of me in a matching pair of bra and panties. Oh who am I kidding. I don't think Ill want to match at all.

I think Ill dress smart and sexy. Business has no place that evening. Unless duty calls...

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

V has already left to catch his flight. He will be back in a week or two. I feel a little bad about not keeping in touch with him more while he was here. Ive been busy and I think he might have certain ideas of what might transpire the next time we are together. He has many ideas, I know, but he is first a gentleman and lets me set the pace.

He might not like the pace but I'm experimenting with paces. I get frustrated as well but its a learning process and I have a lot to learn. I am the grasshopper.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

B3 called me. I was a little busy and told him wed get together sometime next week. Possibly Thursday. He offered me his cell number which was the first time hes ever done that as I don't have any numbers to call him back when he leaves me messages. I didn't have a pen so I told him to give me a call another time and Id get it then.

I wonder if there's an expiry date on things like that. Like if its a one time offer only. We shall see. I'm not sure what we will do. Getting naked isn't an option yet so that will have to wait. Well, he will have to wait.

In a way I think I like not having his number. I know that for some people its a power thing. It is. I just don't let it affect me. I mean if he calls me then I'm in control because I don't have to agree to do anything with him and it shows that he wants to spend time with me. I can always say that I'm busy and he will have to call me back and he does.

Maybe he realizes what it is I have. The advantage. So now he wants to give me his number which I know I wont dial. Why, you ask? Just because. If he didn't want to give it to me when we first met which happens to have been over 6 months ago. I just don't know what changed in his life that is making him want to offer it up to me now.

Ill keep his number and I shouldn't say I wont dial his number. I might. Its not a plan at the moment but things happen for a reason and I don't know what the reason for this is. So I shall just life as it happens... happen. I'm not jumping up and down for joy, not like winning the lottery. Which I'm still waiting to win :)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

D and I had some fantastic sex for lunch. It was rushed, hurried and oh so intense. Its always a lot of fun when were both in the zone and were both there and were both just enjoying it all. The sights, the scents, the sounds, the everything. It was so good I had to change the sheets. The dynamics are changing between us. I'm not sure how things will proceed but its OK. I know that either way. Ill be OK.

I know that we both care about each other. We don't want anyone to get hurt. Though usually when you talk about that someone usually does :) No? Well maybe not always. Lets hope not.

Its the sex. Ill admit it keeps me wanting more. Have you ever heard of such an absurd reason. The sex is really good. I mean. Its spine tingling. The more I get, the more I want. That doesn't sound very smart but its the truth. I don't know if its healthy but the sex is great and having sex is healthy.

Then there's proximity. The more time we spend together the more time I want to spend with him. Take away that time spent together and the I miss it.

So my thing is now. Don't take things for granted and just make the best of the time that I am given.

Have a fantastic weekend and for those people venturing out for work related holiday festivities in the next few weeks. Remember.... Always Classy, Never Trashy.

295 - hope

This morning I woke up a little bit frustrated. I remember going to bed frustrated. I went out with BC last night. Nice guy. 35 yrs old, single and a Doctor. Cute and very attentive. Curious and inquisitive.

Its interesting to meet someone just as curious as I am. We started with some wine which loosened tongues. Which eventually turned to some slight kissing. I was a little undecided about what to do as far as how far I wanted to take it. The kissing part I could handle.

Kissing is something that I enjoy and I always feel like I'm out of practice. Its always different when kissing a new person as I'm not sure how they kiss. What kind of style they have and if it all fits with the way I like to kiss and be kissed. Of course there are many different ways to do it and there's always making the kiss unique to both people.

I'm a little curious to find out what people are thinking as they kiss. What do I think as I'm lip locked? Well last night my thoughts goes as follows and in no particular order... actually the first was the first thought. After that there's no order. I think.

How do you get yourself in these situations Darling.
Hmmmmm
Soft lips.
Warm lips.
Wet tongue.
Soft tongue.
I hope he doesn't slobber on me.
I wonder how long I have to kiss someone to get lock jaw?
Hmmm this is nice.
There's no rush
Enjoy
I wonder how long were going to kiss before his hands roam
Kissing is nice
I feel like I'm out of practice
Tongues are playful
There goes the hand roaming.
Nice hands
Warm hands
respectful hands.
I wonder if he would enjoy it if i sucked on his tongue a bit
Oh he does.
He really does.
Soft lips
No slobber.
I wonder if he thinks ill be sucking on other body parts.

On and on the thoughts went as the kissing went on and on. My blouse somehow becomes unbuttoned, due I'm sure to his roaming hands. My breasts seem to getting much attention lately. As lips, tongue and finger play with my breasts. Thoughts that go through my mind goes as follow and again no particular order other than the first which happens to be again. The first.

How do you get yourself into these situations Darling.
Soft lips.
Soft tongue.
Wet tongue.
I'm not naked.
Why didn't I wear a bra?
Wearing what I was wearing didn't require a bra.
Silly
Plus I like the lace.
Sexy
Its nice looking down and watching someone.
Pleasure me.

We move things to the bed and its oh so comfortable. I just want to lay back, close my eyes and fall into the softness until I'm refreshed and ready to get up for the next day. It might be a bit insulting if I mention that I would rather sleep than have sex. As much as I wanted to him to take me I wanted the bed to take me instead. Both would have been satisfying in different ways.

He mentions that he would be happy with kissing as he thinks I'm a great kisser. I tease him and ask him what made him think that there would be anything more. He stammers for a moment and says that he could only hope...

278 - lurking

I haven't been posting as much as Id like to. I'm concentrating on trying to get through the stages in order to get the job. Ive had to in less than a week talk to3 of my present and previous managers for a reference.

Its unclear whether I am only required to have a list of 3 references or if I need 3 written references. Deep down I think its just a list of 3 they need to be able to contact. However that is also easier than having to go get 3 written ones. Its not hard. Its just getting them all in a timely fashion. @ I have to run after. One was done the same day. The other wants me to write it out myself and has given me carte blanche to embellish if I should so please. I don't as I wouldn't feel comfortable. Honestly is best. Plus the honest truth is I was pretty damn great there and everywhere :)

Writing it out myself is a bit weird as I feel like I'm bragging but its not its just pointing out great qualities that I have. But it still feels like gloating. Ive asked D to draft a letter for me and Ill use that and have that previous employer sign it.

This weekend is Thanksgiving weekend and Monday is a Holiday. Tuesday is my interview and I feel its cutting it a bit close. But it could just be me. I'm kicking myself a little bit as I did have time the week before to get it all done. I was just unsure about getting to this stage. This just teaches me its better to err on the right side of caution.

Its interesting as I did think about it, about getting it done sooner. I'm not quite sure why I didn't. It may be because I don't want to get too ahead of myself. I also didn't want to seem ... full of myself. Now I feel like I'm a monkey on their backs about it.

"I know you're busy, I wanted to know how you were coming along with my reference letter and if I am able to pick it up today."

"Ill be seeing you this Thurs night and Sat night and I was wondering which night to expect it."

"I really appreciate this and I'm pleased that you feel comfortable enough to write a reference letter for me."

Ive decided (very recently... like just now) not to worry too much about it. It would be nice to have all 3 letters in hand when I walk into the interview. It will just give me that extra boost of confidence. However if I only have 1 (which I currently have) or 2 (which I might be able to pick up tonight) Ill be happy. Again all 3 would be great but '2 out of 3 ain't bad' as someone once said :)

There are a few things I need to do to prepare myself for this and Ill have some homework which D has helped me with. I feel like I'm still a bit clueless but he thinks Ill do fine. Just be relaxed and keep things simple. Ive made notes and I'm hopeful and excited about moving ahead.

Its exciting, the thought that I might be doing something different if things should work out. OK not if but WHEN things work out. That's better. Tuesday it is. If things go well with this panel interview then onto the next stage which I will definitely fret over like I usually do.

D had breakfast with Jason from the other night and another of his co workers. I get a call after breakfast and part of the conversation went like this.

D - Jason was pretty drunk that night, he and Pete drank a lot and Jason was pretty out of it.

Darling - It was a good time/

D - Its funny... Jason told me you guys made out that night. He said he asked for a kiss and that's how it started.

Darling - (laughs) If he calls that making out he needs to get back in the game... and if you see him next time, tell him I wasn't satisfied with it.

D - I just laughed when he told that story

Darling - Funny ha ha or funny interestinggg

D - I laughed

Darling - What a little trouble maker... I guess If that's what making out is I also made out with Pete.

The next day. I bring it up again. Why? Because I want to know if it bothered him or if hes OK with it. Should I bother going down this thought process? Would his reaction be an indication of how he sees me? us?

Earlier today. Lunch was a bowl full of sex. Messy sex. In my apartment, on my bed. Just how I like it. Messy enough to take a shower and rush to work with damp hair. Its been a while. It was also very good. Not enough but it was good. So good that while he was in the shower. I took the opportunity to continue to play with myself and make a bigger mess. No he didn't know what I was doing. But I was a bit turned on about him not knowing.

How do you tell someone you want more without insulting them if they cant do more? Or how do I find out if there is a possibility of more but there is something that's holding them back? Specially if its me? EEK!

Its nice what this is. But I think in order for me to continue to enjoy my life. Ill have to take a step back and go out and rub noses with those patiently waiting in The Soup. Its nice to be with someone that doesn't have the same complications as D does. I'm OK with them as I'm pretty laid back that way and peoples lives are so different that when its out of my control. There's nothing I can do about it and there's no reason for me to get all twisted over.

Ive got another long night ahead of me and D might want to go out. I'm not sure if he does or not yet as he was planning on giving me a choice. Lunch today or after hes done work. I don't think he'll want to go out after hes done work. I wont plan on it. But it wold be neat to be surprised.

I need to catch up on sleep and need to buy groceries for Thanksgiving which were celebrating Monday at lunch. We all have plans to have dinner elsewhere for dinner that night and the night before.

Happy Turkey and Have a great weekend. Ill post about how the interview went. Thanks for being in my corner :)

PS I know I haven't been checking blogs lately but I will return to that as soon as things start working itself out in the new job category. Ive been lurking when I can though :)

Darling a lurker.. makes me giggle :)

274 - day before

I took a nap and was late meeting D on Friday oh wait Saturday at that time. We were on the phone an hour before we were supposed to meet and I just wanted to rest my eyes and heard the phone ring and answered it.

D- Where are you?
Darling- Ill be there in a few minutes
D- You know you re late.
Darling- I know I'm sorry Ill see you soon

I flip the phone off and throw the blankets off of me and run to my bedroom for some clothes. I don't bother with any bra or panties. I run out with flip flops on my feet and send a prayer up for green lights and no cops.

About 2 minutes away from meeting him and about 8 minutes after talking to him last. He calls again asking where I am . I tell him about 2 minutes away and I'm sorry. He asks me if I was doing something that shall remain nameless. I said no I wasn't.

I told him the truth as much as I was a bit embarrassed to. That I was sleeping. I meant to close my eyes just to relax and ended up sleeping. He said that I should have told him and we didn't have to meet.

In my head I was thinking. Yes I could have but then who knows when we would get together again. I mean I knew it would be some time during the week but our time together is limited and its a treat to see him. It really is.

I get all shy and girly and I hold myself in check sometimes because I literally want to drag him home to bed. Or the car, the nearest park bench or picnic table... you get the idea.

So I tell him that 'I want to see you tonight' I know that we aren't going to have sex but I still want to see him. I cant explain it. I cant tell you if he feels the same way. All I know is that I like... him.

I like talking to him on the home and find it a bit difficult with him cutting back on phone time. I like seeing him in any capacity, whether its just us two or in a group setting. I just like being near him. So I was sleeping and was late seeing him I was still happy to see him even if its for a couple of hours.

Ive also gotten in the habit of kissing him every so often when the mood hits. I just lean in and press my lips to his, pull away and continue on with the conversation. He always smiles when he sees me lean in as well as after I do it. He never does anything that says its not wanted. I don't mind that he doesn't do the same thing. If he does. Ill be surprised. Pleasantly.

What can I say I like him. That and sometimes I have the most incredible urge to take his lower lip between mine and rub my tongue from side to side. Tomorrow...

I wont see him today. Tomorrow we are meeting for lunch unless something comes up that wont allow that to happen. I'm not sure if he knows what tomorrow is. Ive mentioned it without saying it outright. Ive mentioned that it was a week after The Big Dogs. Ive left it at that.

I'm undecided about whether I want him to know or not... or if I want to tell him outright. If he doesn't say anything because he doesn't know then that's OK with me. Its not a big deal. If he happens to mention something then it will be nice. I'm not going to think he doesn't care if nothing happens. Its another day is what it is.

I'm probably not even going to remember until someone calls me to remind me. But much is planned. People who remember have called and made plans to spend some time together. That's nice, I like it that way.

Well another year has gone by. Its been a great year. I didn't do half as much as I wanted to and did too many things that might have been better not. But overall I'm happy and healthy. In the big picture I can improve on certain parts of my life, things are going well in most.

My sister says I still look like I did when I was 18/19. I wonder if that will ever change. Quite possibly. So for now, and everyday that follows.

Enjoy.

Oh and Ill be bar tending more often. As often as I can handle it that is. Ill have to see how my body is doing and how much it can take. Which means Ill also be rearrabging my work schedule for J2 and J3 until I figure out how much I can handle.

272 - glow and blush

My Grandmother may be going home tomorrow. My aunts a bit hesitant to bring her home so soon. However the patient is anxious to return to her home. I cant blame her.

I got called in to work tonight unexpectedly. I said yes. They were in a bind and my plans fell through.

Lunch with D was not only sexually satisfying. It was also emotionally satisfying. I really didn't want to go back to work. Though I did and I did have a smile that wouldn't go away. A glow, a blush that remains until now. We didn't spoon or cuddle or any of that but we did stay in bed and talk about things. It was... really nice. x`

What a fun afternoon. Which brings me to my next few thoughts.

- Libidos. What is low, normal/average or high? Does masturbation count or not.
- I know I shouldn't compare myself or my sex life with anyone elses.
- Sometimes it seems like I'm at the end of the line and everyone is doing things or trying things that I haven't and I continue to wait until its my turn.
- Other times Its the other way around.
- But mostly it seems like I'm at the tail end of the sexual revolution and I need to catch up.
- Catch up on what? I cant imagine things have changed that much.
- Or has it?
- I don't know, I'm trying to figure it out.
- So back to libidos. Does thinking about it count or is it just the act that counts.
- Because if thinking about.. .things count then... never mind :)

Ill be talking about this some more some other time :)

268 - yesterday, today and tomorrow

Yesterday

Dropped my cell phone and it didn't want to turn on again for the rest of the day. Got a great deal for a new phone and I took it. I still have hope for my old phone.

Didn't get a call from friend who is in TPB. Was suppose to go out. Instead I stayed home, indulged in some fantastic movies of the adult kind. And by movies I mean about 45 minutes of one... during which I myself put on a fantastic epic performance of my own. To which promptly led me to a nap. Which brought on some kinky dreams of yours truly and some faceless men and quite possibly a woman on the sidelines though I woke up before ... so I have naught to report on that end ;)

Today

After a fantastic run and shower in the morning and being surprisingly awake seeing as I went to bed after midnight. Got to work and learned about a bonus coming to my bank account :) Was supposed to meet with D and that didn't happen.. again. No its not on purpose and no I don't mind THAT much. These things happen. I tell you I'm the best girl/friend to have. So understanding not to mention accommodating. Did some banking, celebrate another moment of triumph for being able to lower my cell phone bill AND get on a better plan than I currently have. Got free services extended for another couple of weeks and gave myself a pat on the back for doing all that with a female customer service rep.

Old phone turned on after trying it.. amazingly. Silly me turned it off and its in a deep sleep again. I'm not worried I still have my new phone :)

5 minutes ago.

Sent D a text message because I was full of happy thoughts and am in a fantastic mood. Just spent about 30 minutes on the phone w D and cant tell you details about what we talked about but it was just as good as a nap :) Refreshing and a definite energy boost.

Darling - :) I like u
D - Ah that was sweet

Which was promptly followed up by a phone call from D letting me know that he will call me later on as his phone is dying. As I'm smiling away and relishing the fact that I like just getting things out there sometimes and not worrying about the aftereffects/consequences of my statements or actions, I am thinking of cuddling with him

I'm stumbling. I know. Ill be OK. I have my eyes wide open and can see whats happening. I just hope Ive got some protective gear that are invisible to the eye. If not then I hope for a soft landing.

Later Today.

Dinner with AR, hopefully something naughty and titillating afterwards. THEN possibly seeing D for a few drinks. Yes same night. Yes D knows about AR. Have I not mentioned that I was honest about these things. I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea or to imagine that I am leading someone on. Honesty and the best policy... unless...

Tomorrow.

Be happy its Friday though my days always have some form of work involved so Its not much of a weekend though I appreciate the decreased amount of work that I have for the following 2 days. There will be some daily flirting with the opposite sex and other items that fall under the category of life.

260 - good news bad news

People have asked me what I do when I leave for lunch. Nosy I know. I smile and try not to blush too much to give it away. Most of the time I say errands or lunch with a friend. Though one day I'm sure they will question my answer as my clothes sometimes have water marks from not drying myself off after a quick shower when I return. Or was it a quickie in the shower. HA!

Nooners. :) Love them. Middle of the day sex. Satisfaction. What I enjoy for lunch? My options?Food, naps and sex and not generally in that order. Now if only I had a time enough to cover all of those :) Wouldn't that be a daily treat. Wouldn't it indeed.

Good news Bad news.

Bad news first?

OK. Bad news is the amount of sex that Ive had in the past say 2-3 months have been lacking, not in the quality dept but yes I will say it. Quantity dept. I know its better to have quality over quantity. But I'm not normal. I want both. I want a good quantity of good quality sex.

I want the cake, icing, chocolate dipped strawberries on top, topped off with some whipped cream and I want to eat it. Oh do I want to eat it :) AHEM!


The Soup hasn't been all that accommodating in that area as schedules are not working well. Things come up and plans change. Its all still been very fun but the fact is that I am somewhat unfulfilled.

I spoke to D about it. Told him I was a bit down as my sex life has been lacking and yes I wanted him to know that sex with him was lacking in the quantity dept. Which he quickly reminded me that the amount would increase come September.

How did he know that was on my list of things to get for my birthday?

The good news?

As of next week his schedule is changing again and its going back to how it was before. Which is good for a couple of reasons. We'll have more sex. YAY :) We'll see each other more often and our phone bills wont be so high. Ill tell you about that later. Though I must say it really is good to be a girl sometimes :) OK for me... most times.

So looking forward to more sex, saving money and seeing more of someone that keeps me wanting. As for what I want... well...

258 - waiting

OK So I find D attractive. Hes not Brad Pitt. Interestingly enough I will never end up with

A. Brad Pitt Or

B. a Brad Pitt look alike.

Which is fine by me as some things are meant to remain a fantasy. Other than Brad Pitt, there is also the pirate, the judge and the... Oh come on... You know who your fantasy ladies are.

OK so back to the reason for this post. My sex life hasn't always been this active. Sometimes its been crazier HA! But really I have a healthy sex life. Nothing to write home about. It has its good times and very good times. You know the usual :) But really I wouldnt write home about, as that would just leave me in a perpetual blush.


So Ive been told that D wants to work out and lose 10 lbs. I personally am turned on by him mentally and physically. So I was careful in what I said. I supported him of course and said its great that he wants to be healthier. Though I know he doesn't want to get harpooned when he goes to Venezuela, Cuba or the Dominican Republic. His words not mine. Which really made me laugh and think.. if he thinks he would get harpooned... whatever would they do with me if they saw me? (gulp)

Hes been wanting to do that for the past month or so and just hasn't gotten the drive or motivation. He has it just not consistently.

So his idea to get things done. Is to abstain from sexual intercourse and any acts of self induced pleasure. I don't mind him not masturbating. Its the no sex part that I have issues with as I'm affected.

My first words after hearing that? OK well then lets get to it! How do I help? Need a trainer? How about you and I work out an hour everyday and see how that works. (wink wink) Ive got something that will get your heart rate up and sure to you will lose calories. That made him laugh. It made me want to hole up with him for a week in a hotel to remind him what hes giving up... you know... motivation to remind him what hes going to give up.

Tell me. Is sacrificing sex to lose weight motivation for anyone? After talking about it for a while I thought about it and kind of want to give up sex until I lose x amount as well. Notice how I didn't give up satisfying myself? I'm not sure I could but maybe I could try it out and see how long I last.

We shall see. Hmmm well. Erm, humunummm

I told him that was serious and that he should think long and hard about hindering and messing with my sex life. His not a problem. But mine... tsk tsk. He knows that I wouldn't be happy with the no sex rule so he said hes just thinking about it. But in the event that he does decide to go for it. I would be the first to know.

How considerate huh? :) We both laughed.

So I mentioned that maybe it might work. I'm actually considering it. Imagine? A sex deprived better looking me? Watch out.

Ill have to wait and see what he decides.

255 - whats your pleasure?

So D's on the phone with me last night and he asks me if I have heard of this place called the Le Nordik - Nature Spa http://www.lenordik.com/ for those of you who are curious to see what its about :)

I tell him that I have heard of it and want to visit it some day as it looks really relaxing. Ever so nonchalantly he mentions that 'maybe when you start your new job (hes oh so supportive about me getting this position) we'll be able to go together. I hear they have some great packages, we can have some wine, massages and relax in the pools together.'

Oh it might never happen but a girl like me? I'm happy with the idea and him mentioning the idea. I'm such a girl its unbelievable.

My plans with J fell through again. How many chances does a guy need? History? It was the third or was it the fourth time that we had planned to meet and something came up. Its also a bit strange that the only nights he can meet are Tuesday or Thursday nights. Fishy I say.

So I tell D that meeting with J isn't going to happen and that I feel a bit bored and restless as I was expecting to go out for a bit. He suggests me renting a movie. I tell him Ive already seen what I have and he repeats the renting part of his suggestion. Cheeky!

I tell him its a great idea and I ask him if he could stop by and pick up a movie and bring it over so we could watch it together. He laughs and tells me I'm non stop. I smile and laugh with him. You cant blame a girl for trying right?

So no movie. No date. Instead. I made a Mango Martini, ran a hot bubble bath, a book by Laurell K Hamilton 'The Harlequin' and parked my naked self into the bathtub for some self indulgences.

Who says I need to be out and about all the time? I can very well enjoy myself over and over all by myself :)

Today. I have strong memories and flashbacks of the self indulgences which makes for me looking forward to lunch with D all the more... intense.

On one hand, we may have sex at my place which would surely make both our days. On the other hand we may decide not to go to my place and instead go have lunch somewhere. Where it will drive me bananas because I'm thinking of what could be happening at my place. Its all good. Ive been able to enjoy the tease that it has become.

Not getting serious about anything with D. Its an adventure. One of those choose your own pleasure kind :)

Whats your pleasure?

Dream, Fantasy, Truth or Fiction

Candles are lit across the room. I look down and my exposed skin looks enticing. I have a sheer green wrap, panties that would come off with a slight tug of the string tied on either side. Under the wrap, with the panties, is a lacy fitted tank top.

The door opens, he lays down and I stand by the side of the bed. He looks me over taking in what I have on and his eyes linger in places where there is exposed skin and the movement of my hands catches his attention. I reach and let my fingers trail over him softly. He grows with every stroke, every motion back and forth over him.

He pulls me closer and makes the wrap fall to the floor. With a look of approval he takes his hands and traces my breasts, cups them and shower them with attention. My nipples enjoy this and I squeeze him just so and his breath catches. I lean down and press my lips against his. We kiss, tongues playful.

He has pulled my breasts free. They are cupped by his hands and contoured with the lace gathered underneath them. His tongue swirls around them and he alternates one with the other, making them hard peaks. Goosebumps cover my body and I have a delicious shiver up my spine. His fingers continue to move inside me making me bite my lip slightly. My hips moving back and forth with him.

I dip my head low and take him in my mouth and feel how hard he is. I breath in his scent. My one hand cupping him in my hand the other wrapped around him. I hear him exhale and slowly move my head up and down over him. Lips soft around him. His fingers still when I tighten my lips. But they still deep, deep inside me and we both throb against each other.

I stand up and he slips out of me as I find my way in between his legs to continue to feel him harden in my mouth. He has pulled on the ties and soon has my clothes thrown around the room. My hand and my mouth alternate over him and soon he is pulling me up and our hands locks together where his body starts pumping up into mine while I bring my body down to meet his.

Slowing things down a little our tongues dance and his hands roam. They play with my already hard nipples. They tighten even more with every caress of his thumb. I lean back and watch his hand trail down to where we meet and his thumb continues to caress. My head is thrown back, my hands tighten on his knees and he doesn't stop until my body springs forward back to face him. My hands braced on either side of his head, he takes hold of my hips with a tight grip and my breasts feel the force of his thrusts as they move back and forth over his face.

We find ourselves limbs entwined, hearts pumping, breaths coming out hard and fast. Smiling all through it all.

241 - additions

I'm thinking in my head that this is something that needs to be dealt with. Its something that I cant have looming up at me in the middle of the day. I blame D. No, I cant, its not all his fault. He was just the trigger. He started this all with an orgasm. Now I want more.

Hes not able to. Give me more that is. So I'm left to my own devices... and quite frankly I don't want to be left with my devices. Time to bring in The Soup. This is why The Soup exists :)

I had to go run a couple of errands and then had planned on meeting with J. Who called to reschedule. ARGGHH!! That's OK. Hes working on opening up his pool and wanted to get it all done in one day. I was invited to use it anytime. I wonder if he decided to open his pool because he heard about my bikini that I wanted to use and have yet to. That couldn't be it.

I put myself under house arrest when I got home. Kind of climbed the walls for a little while. meditated but all I had in my mind were images of me in various positions with blissful expressions on my face. Meditation didn't help. So I put on some music and danced. Soon I noticed that stripper like songs were coming on and that just reminded me of nakedness.

I indulged in some moves that didn't involve a pole and laughed at myself. Still it was a good time. Maybe one day ill have that pole.

I played tug of war with The Big Dog. I win. I always win. Cant have her win otherwise she gloats :) I spent some time with The Little One. Shes not doing so well anymore. For a while she was doing very well. The eye drops and ear ointment seem to have helped a lot. But other things are coming up and shes not looking as happy.

The quality of life has gone down and its time. Really. I'm glad to have has this extra time with her. Its been great. My brother has been spending more time with her as well and has also noticed the decline.

I though to myself if I was in her position what would I want. To go.

Playing with the Little One took me out off of the train to orgasm and made me spend more time with them. Good times. Took some pictures. Told them secrets no one else knows. I know they wont tell anyone. I talked about this and that which helped get it off my chest and mind.

I tired them out and they both went to their beds which are side by side. I went to my room and slept.

Didn't want to get up this morning. Having a lazy day. Nap time for sure later on and then Casino night with a girlfriend and her dad. Should make for an interesting night.

D couldn't meet for lunch today. His dad is coming by to discuss a few things and plan some other things with him. Bummer. Maybe tonight after the casino? We shall see.

I sent K a text while I was in bed last and he called me back immediately. Caught up on things and made plans to meet this Friday night. Hes coming over with dinner. August is coming up fast so I think ill take advantage, I don't think he will mind. I'm also going to pick his male brain apart. He thinks its cute when I do and likes the way I think out loud when were together. Says it gives him an insight to me.

B is in TO until next week. I talked to him for a while too last night and we had a good conversation. We'll get together sometime when he returns. Maybe catch a movie. B called about an hour or so ago thinking I wouldn't answer. He was surprised to hear me answer and I think I flustered him a little bit. He wanted to find out how I slept last night and was planning on leaving me a message. Seeing as he was the last person I talked to. He called and interrupted my sleep which I told him he would pay dearly for. So he sang me a lullaby... well.. he started... didn't finish but he did lull me back to sleep. Bidding me sweet dreams. Nice voice.

So his call today was to let me know hes on his way to Alberta, has a meeting there and will be back in TO tonight. How man will travel. I told him I wasn't happy that I wasn't invited on the trip. Maybe next time he says. We shall see wont we. So when hes back in Ottawa he'll call me again. Looking forward to it B.

B1 is new. Not to be mistaken for B(above) He is interesting. They both are. But B1 is interesting with a twist. Wont go into details yet about him just yet. Ill let things settle first. Hes calling me tonight sometime to discuss when we can go for a drink. I think hes trying to be a 'good boy' and not upset me. It will be interesting with him.

I just called D and told him I was hit by the hornies. He growled something sexy in my ear which didn't help in the pooling dept. Oh how sweet it would have been to meet for a quickie. He thinks I'm constantly on the go. Both socially and sexually. He likes it but I get the feeling he doesn't like it at the same time. Oh well. Ill continue to do what I do.

We had a conversation about Las Vegas and how he wanted to go... I told him I wanted to go too... yes Ill admit I wanted him to ask me to go with him. (blush) He didn't. So I said that's OK Ill go with a friend who I have been meaning to go with for the longest time :) The time is coming. I hope. Should be fun.

What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas... well... of course Ill blog about it. Don't you worry. Sharing is caring, right?!?

He mentioned going to a place where it might be better if I went with a boyfriend... and I said 'well seeing as I don't have one of those at the moment. I think Ill have to make it on my own' again.. I was fishing. Don't ask me what I was thinking. I was fishing and kind of wanted to find out what we are. Which I already know but I want to make sure by hearing it from him and all this just left me in the exact same place as I was before.

Right here :)

237 - meeting friends

This weekend was great. I worked FIFA U-20 on Saturday and it was great. Lots of fun, lots of people, lots of them drinking and coming back for more. Tips that night were great and I have pocket money for the next week. Which incidentally is also a 4 day week :) Love it when that happens!

Saturday night after working FIFA. D and I start texting right away and he tells me hes out with the boys for a night out and really wants to get together with me afterwards. Yeah its been a while. I know this, he knows this and as of now and what I shared on my post on Friday so do you. I want to get together with him too. I go home about midnight, shower then slip into a nightie and check the lighting and atmosphere. I don't spend much time doing that as its always primed and ready for .. action. My apartment that is... Me on the other hand... well.. that's another story. Or is it?

After a few more texts I become Ds DD for the night. Ill pick him up later on and take him home mu hu ha ha! My home that is. What Ill do with him when I get him there is well... I'm sure you all have an idea or few :)

10 minutes later change of plans. If I want to... I can meet up with him now and meet him at the bar where he and his friends are. Who I have never met. ARG! I kind of have a mind bomb.

I'm really shy you see. I'm pretty shy. I'm very shy. I'm quiet, kind of reserved sometimes and very private. OK I have moments of all the above. It doesn't always happen that they all happen all at the same time. A mind bomb is when it all happens at the same time. When I fell really shy, quiet, reserved and private... add insecure to the mix and there you have a mind bomb.

It lasted long enough for my libido to diffuse the mind bomb which got me into... after much debate on what to wear... into a little black skirt with a little black tank top, sexy heels and and a black sweater. The shyness got through and pulled the sweater on before I left the apartment. Its good to be shy sometimes... it ended up a little chilly and it was perfect for the night. I was dressed.. sexy smart :)

I find parking and bump into a tall man on the street who asks me where I am headed and I let him know I'm heading to the bar. He walks me there a block and a half down and kisses my hand. Sweet. I ring D and he comes out and talks to the doorman who lets me in no questions.

Did I mention I was a little nervous? I'm meeting his friends who hes known since he was 5 years old and one of them an investment banker who tore down a 6 figure home and had another built for 1.5 billion dollars? Another is a paramedic from Calgary. The last one? Never did find out :)

Met his friend R first and got along great from the get go. Phew! He said he loved the way I smelled and asked me if it was my perfume, shampoo or what? I told him it was natural. He laughed and said that could get addicting. I laughed with him and asked him how drunk D was and he said the appropriate thing. Not at all. Good friend. I knew D was there and have been for a while. I'm glad hes a happy drunk. Makes for a good time.

D orders a round for everyone and we carry drinks to the boys on the patio and may I say that I was greeted warmly. Kisses and hugs and laughter. What more could I have asked for? Of yes that's right. Flattery. R for the scent I had on. H for how I looked. G for wondering if they were real or not.

So light banter was exchanged and I gave as good as I got. I saw these men chat up a couple of blond 21 year olds and I felt a little like chopped liver. What can I say? Tall blond leggy ladies always seem to ... well.. that's another post. Anyway. I enjoyed the entertainment. 2 young TBLs who didn't have a clue how to handle the attentions of 3-4 (I say 3-4 because D was there but not paying 'much' attention to them like the rest were) OK so I watched them all and heard the conversation and the subject of ages came up. The ladies aren't into older men. Pity. More for me :)

They didn't know how to handle them. From what I could tell. Did I mention they were all good looking? Anyway... the ladies left and when they did... I heard how they really felt. One had a huge ass. Nice hair, not so nice face. But all in all. Bad attitude. I threw in that 'you guys are awful with women!' Which got me the explanation that their attitudes were awful. So being hot means nothing if the attitude isn't there.

Which brought the conversation to me. Somehow. I wasn't trying to fish and they started to talk about me, right in front of me. It was a little discerning but also quite intriguing. Of course I stayed and held my breath because if I heard anything negative I would have been swallowed by the ground with embarrassment.

Great attitude, no BS, flirty without going over the top. Great body, good looking and can handle being alone with 4 guys who are talking about her. We all laugh and its an all around great night. I don't plan on drinking but have a 3 glasses of rum and diet coke. I spend some time with H and great guy. Hes the one from Calgary. One of D's oldest friends. Who apparently has a memory like an elephant. I test this and tell him my first, middle and last name once. He should before we part for the night recall it for me.

He asked me how D and I met. I blushed and told him that Id let D tell him the story. I wasn't even sure how I feel about how I met D. I don't even think Ive blogged about it. Oh well. I'm not about to now :) dun dun dunnnn...

I get some alone time with D. The boys all look at each other and one comes up with a reason to go in. The rest follow. It looks like it was done on purpose. So D and I make out. Actually I fix my mouth on his and we kiss. He had no choice. Well he did. He just chose to go along with it :) Weeeee!!

The boys come back with more drinks in hand. I haven't finished mine and they tell me to hurry up and catch up. I tell them if I were to catch up I think Id need a whole bottle and a few shots to get where they are. They said that could be arranged and I laughed and told them to be good.

The subject returned to younger women and older men and I kept quiet and listened to them go on about how its much better to be with an older man. I smiled inwardly thinking its nothing I haven't learned before on my own but it was nice to hear. Quite endearing. Its all about finding someone that thinks the same way. Some will. Some wont.

Which brings their next question to me. How old was I? I laugh and ask them how old they think I am. I get kind of nervous and think is there an age where I shouldn't ask this anymore as they might actually think I'm older than I am? Which means that my looks show that I am older than I really am and that wouldn't be good. Who wants to look older than they are? Not me that's for sure.

I get 22 from G, 23-24 from R and '2 and 7' from H. H wins a hug from me and I wonder a couple of things. D heads inside to get another round and leaves me with these guys to which I protest jokingly telling him I might not be safe with these guys. To which the said guys all laugh. Flattery goes both ways. Nothing I cant handle. I am woman watch me flirt.

I wonder if D told H how old I was? I wonder if guys purposely spout a number they know to be less than what they actually think/know to flatter someone. I wonder if I should censor myself before asking that last I wonder above.

With that out in the open. They say no, not at all. Oh well. That answer works for me. D returns and I do my duty telling G and H that smoking is bad for them. I find them a light and do my duty as the volunteer wing girl to try to hook them up with available ladies.

The ladies notice how nice I am and all that. Which brings the boys attentions back to me. I'm not trying to get the attention. Its just happening, Its times like these that I am happy in the shadows. I walk to D and I whisper that I cant wait to get him home. He laughs and nibbles on my ear. YUM.

I get pulled away by H who tells D to share. I raise my eyebrow and H says that we should go dance. We head inside and the sweater comes off and eyes take in what was previously covered. The question of whether they were real or not comes back up and I told them they were fake. Mouths dropped open which were helped closed by the next guy and laughter was heard.

They all wanted to feel and I laughed. D however felt the need to exert his presence and reach over to feel a breast. Real he says but the guys are all wanting to feel now too and I laugh it off. R asks how D gets to touch and I look at him and said something along the lines of us having been intimate and like a lightning bolt I hear well we can do that too. He got me there. I laugh that one off too.

After an offer of a hotel room being rented for their viewing pleasure was dutifully declined by yours truly. I promptly took D away, but not after being the social butterfly and making sure they all knew that I enjoyed their company. I did have a lot of fun. It was good to go out and meet some more of his friends. More on that thought later.

Hours later at home and quite a mess later... details aren't really needed are they? (smile) I drove D home. I got back home to my bed about 430am.

Get a wake up call on Sunday at 7am. Misery sure does love company. Thanks for interrupting my dream D. Thanks.

221 - hat and heels

A hard hat was handed to me last week and I was told that I needed to wear it not necessarily at my desk but when I leave the office and out into the main building.

Hard hats Ive learned dont do anything for me that I think is physically pleasing to the eye. The construction workers and the other people (men) that I work with in different departments and other buildings. Apparently a big turn on. Comments range from...

- I hope you are able to bring that home with you.. (CW)

- You look really good in a hard hat (Construction worker)

- In my dreams you've got the hat, your heels and moving around a pole (CW)

- You know that's a huge turn on for me. Women in hard hats...

So if all else fails ladies.. get a hard hat. Mine was white to represent my purity. (smiles sweetly) I didn't get a choice. we all got brand spanking new, never been work hard hats.

Ive got to lug this thing around on my head or in my hand for a total of 6 weeks here at work. Lovely. It takes up space and isn't very pretty. I wanted to white Princess in front but that wouldn't have gotten old at some point and I would want to erase it and write Priestess...Your Highness or maybe something a bit less intimidating :)

Ive talked to most of the construction workers and a few colleagues have mentioned that I shouldn't flirt with them so much. I told them that I was being friendly. They were flirting. Maybe if I flirt they'll get the job done faster. Doubt it. I don't have that much influence.

Its been hot then cold in the office here. The lights have been on and off and I keep sending mental messages to them to accidentally cut a major source of power so that none of the computers work and therefore I don't have to work. I guess bed isn't the only place I'm selfish.

The amount of noise here is unreal and not made by me or the other people I work with. Construction noise is loud. I'm kind of annoyed by it. Only because it isn't very professional to be dealing with people on the phone when you have to scream and yell at each other and ask them to repeat themselves numerous times.

They've decided to leave my department here in the building right by where all the renos will be done because it would have been too much of a hassle to move all the computers and such to another location. Not nice.

So just to see what I would look like in just the hat and heels. I stripped in front of the mirror at home last week and fully clothed, the hat does nothing for me. Naked, with only the hard hat and heels, kind of sexy. OK a lot sexy. But that could just be because I think its sexy to be naked with heels on. Men in heels not so much. Women in heels. Much.

K called me last night we had a short talk about things that we have been up to and I'm confused about how to approach him about something. Cant say what it is outright but it may never come out in conversation. So ill just let things go on as they are. We might be meeting this weekend. Not sure yet

Oh, Ill be seeing M this Thursday. I figure Ill have an earlier night with M than if I went to work bartending. I know Ill be really tired and will want to sleep. I know it might seem like I'm picking the more boring of the 2 and I don't usually, but this time I am.

All in the name of preservation. I want to make sure that I am OK for the following days and not dead on my feet or frustrated for some reason or another. This way, this option is the best in the long run... or until it proves otherwise lol

Ive just been hit with a bad case of the sleepies. I need a nap. I think Ill go take one for about an hour.