339 - uniforms

Whenever people find out that I went to a catholic school their ears perk up. Mainly the men who also correlate that with me in a uniform. They also ask me if I still have my uniform and I roll my eyes and smile. I know whats coming up. The fantasy of a girl in a school uniform. White blouse, skirt, knee high socks with a naughty do me attitude to go with it.

What man could resist?

Come to think of it when I was in High School I remember getting a lot of horns blown my way as they drove by. I used to just smile and wave. To be polite and all. Such a powerful thing it is to have an outfit. The same thing goes with wearing a pantsuit to a convention. Fitted of course. To distinguish between the men and myself. I prefer a skirt of course. Add in the garter belt and stay ups...

I remember looking at a mirror before leaving home. I would turn slightly and see the curve from the small of my back to where my ass started to come out and if I thought it was sexy then Im sure that some other people would think that as well.

People are very visual and by people I mean men though women are as well. Dont let that fool you. Women check everyone out. Yes, you, that guy behind you and even the woman standing in front of you. We want to see everyone. We as in me :)

So there has been a request for me to show up one day in my school uniform. They also included what I should wear underneath it. Im pretty certain that wont happen but its nice to follow that train of thought and imagine what might occur should I do it. Love this imagination of mine.

Maybe one day? Perhaps...

338 - commitments

I had a little bit of a headache and all I needed was to sleep it off. That was nice that it wasn't something more serious. What wasn't nice was that I wasn't able to sleep. I wasn't able to take a nap as my day way booked full of this and that. It was nice to be able to get it all crossed off my list but it wasn't nice that I had this headache to deal with the whole day.

Ive got a few things left to do which shouldn't take long so I'm looking forward to sleeping until tomorrow comes.

Training has me a little worried. I'm to the point where its kind of boring and by that I mean that I'm kind of scared and feel a little clueless. Its kind of a big deal this job and they take it really seriously. Lots of safety things to think of and all that. I guess I'm a little worried as its an actual career and not just one of those for now not forever situations.

This is it. Its got a lot of what everyone is looking for, security, flexibility, options to move to different departments, great pay, pensions and benefits. Some would ever say its cash for life. So why don't I want it? I'm not sure. It seems like a lot of responsibility.

Yes you can say I want something easy. I want something easy that pays a lot. I know its not always possible to get what I want but that was just something I had to share. Makes me sound lazy but I 'm honest.

I know Ill do this. I know that Ill do my best (I hope) I know that I wont know until I try and that I cant give up now. So many people applied for these positions and I scored high along with the rest of the people in my class so I should be happy that I got it and that Ive made it this far.

What is it about success that I'm scared of? Maybe ill save that for another post. One serious issue a post :)

They are hiring a lot more people after me so I wont be at the bottom. They said were in a good position as were at the beginning of the wave and we can ride it as long as we keep out noses clean.

Being somewhat of a perfectionist I know I wont always be right on the dot with this job but they said that they expect us not to be on target all the time. It happens and we can only do what we can and since we cant control everything we work with what we have.

Its a career. People stay in this company for 20-25 odd years. There are so many people eligible to retire and they don't because they all love it. I'm hoping I'm one of those that love it. As for staying for 20-30 years. Thats a long time and a huge commitment.

If I cant make a commitment to one person Ill have to practice with this career. How odd does that sound? Oh well I play the hand I'm given.

Happy Easter!!

What I Think Of When

Whenever I hear this song, I am seduced by his voice. I realize how there are masses of people that fall for rockstars/entertainers. One of the reasons anyway. Voices. His is low and sensual to my ears and its just all around yummy for me.

This song makes me want to have someone call me for that reason, though in reality I would'nt want to hurt anyone. No one wants to do that. But I do understand that people around the world are in such a situation. Do I envy those people? Maybe in a way. They care for each other and they had some time together. Then again. They already had their time together and if things were meant to be then wouldn't they still be together? If they were still together then there wouldn't have to be any clandestine phone calls.

What is it that I like about the situation they are in? Maybe that they have each other in a distant sort of way. Plus they have their partner of the moment. Is it a part of me that wants to have a partner? Not at this time. Maybe... in the future sometime. Or is it the fact that I'm not sure how I would react in such a situation? Meh! Life is short. Be happy. Don't hurt anyone. In other words, bad advise to come ... if you're going to do something that isn't on the up and up. Do not get caught.

Lips of an Angel
By Hinder

Honey why are you calling me so late
It's kinda hard to talk right now
Honey why are you crying is everything okay
I gotta whisper cause I can't be too loud
Well, my girls in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak
And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

It's funny that you're calling me tonight
And yes I've dreamt of you too
And does he know you're talking to me
Will it start a fight
No I don't think she has a clue
Well my girls in the next room
Sometimes I wish she was you
I guess we never really moved on
It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those wordsa it makes me weak
And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak
And I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel
(And I never wanna say goodbye)
But girl you make it so hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel
Honey why are you calling me so late

337 - just things

Theres so many things happening I dont know where to start. It will all come out somehow but a bit messy and jumbled. Ill try to make sure that theres some sort of flow and that it all makes a little bit of sense.

Theres another girl that talks to SE in class and Im a bit 'hmmph' about it. It doesnt bother me what it does is amuse me. That I react that way towards someone who I dont really care about (the girl) in regards to the object of her attention (SE).

It makes me think and it really does amuse me. I smile and chuckle at myself at my reaction. Ill find myself wondering what they are whispering about. I guess another thing is I dont whisper with him. If I have something to say to him whether its something thats considered flirty Ill say it out loud and make sure that other people hear and can join in. Otherwise whispering just makes people wonder...like I did :)

Its mostly ribbing each other like you do when you have some sort of interest in someone. One of the people who I found extremely amusing and who was a big supporter of SE and I getting together and becoming a couple is no longer part of our class. Hes been asked to leave for reasons unknown. So Im sad to see him go and now I wonder who will take his place and tease us both in that respect. Im sure someone will.

It was a quiet affair for my sisters Birthday. We went to The Keg Steakhouse. I gave her what I thought would be well taken as far as gifts go. Money. I know not very original. But I wanted to make sure that I wasnt going to disappoint her with something that I would have picked out. Im not very girly when it comes to that. Im not a big fan of shopping for other people as Im not sure what they need, want or are looking at. Shopping for myself? Different story altogether.

We laughed, drank and ate enough to give my Visa a workout. Its not every day that your little sister turns 24. She tried to help with the bill but that just wouldnt do. She managed to slip me some bills before she got out of the car. Actually she slipped it into the center console and sent me a text message the day after to make sure I got it. Ill be returning what she left me. Silly girl. I love her.

We had a ridiculous amount of snow that fell over the weekend something upwards of 45 cms. Ill have to say it was beautiful. Magical even. Just not very nice for people who were driving around getting stuck. I was lucky to have gotten in on time so as to not have had those problems. I did help a few people go on with their drive. It was nice. I felt helpful and I was hoping that it would help with my karmic adventure of life.

Ive taken some pictures from my cell phone and hope that Im able to figure out how to get them up on the blog here. Theres a lot of snow. Driving around in it is done very carefully. Its hard to see around the corner to see whats coming. Better safe than sorry.

Its funny, Im not really available to do much, me being in training that is. Seeing how my time at home is taken up with preparing for the next day. Its difficult to make plans on short notice. Now that Im quite busy with preparing for the next day, my cell phone has been ringing off the hook. Sometimes when I forget to put it in vibrate while in class it will ring and Ill get teased about how popular I am. Dont worry I tease as good as I get.

Some of the instructors are really nice and tease me along with the class. Actually no ones really given me a hard time about it but Ive gotten better at making sure that its on silent or vibrate. They have enough to tease me about and Im just trying to keep it to a minimum.

Yesterday I did something that I wasnt sure was avoidable. I asked one of the guys I was with and they said that no matter how hot I was they wouldnt lie to me. I laughed and was taken aback a little bit as I wasnt fishing for compliments. I was just looking for honesty.

Spontaneous and unexpected compliments like that always put me in a good mood. So dont be shy about handing those out to people that you want to compliment. Its always nice. I find. You never know how much it means to that person so I recommend something as simple as 'you look really nice today' or 'that color really looks nice on you' Try those out and see how they work for you.

D and I were able to get together for a little while yesterday and it was a rollercoaster trying to set something up. It was fun and very funny. We talked about a few things that were serious and other things that involved us. I tend to shy and beat around the bush when it comes to having to ask him something sometimes. He thinks its cute. Im just glad that were able to talk about things that are on my mind and that hes open to talking about it and not just sweeping it under the rug.

Its funny, people thinking that Im pretty, hot or something along those lines. When I look at myself in the mirror I can see where I want to make improvements and where I am making improvements. I wonder if they can see it like I see it. Probably not. I mean they do see it but I think it doesnt bother them as much as it does me.

Thats why sometimes Its easy and others not so. Once we realize that people dont care about the same things we care about it will make us feel better. Knowing that we all have different perspectives and different ideas of whats hot or not.

One of my girlfriends is trying to set something up so that we can get together and spend some time together. Its hard with my schedule but were trying.

One of the instructors, the one my imagination runs wild with, is self conscious about something which I find adorable. We had some time to talk about things and that came up and I just smiled to myself thinking that if he knew what I was thinking...

I think it might be a little inappropriate for me to mention something now but in about 3 weeks when my training is finished Ill mention something. Of course Ill have to prefice it with something of an disclaimer so he'll get a bigger kick out of it.

I think he wanted me to be in his group today. He didnt realize that I was in a different group and pulled me aside. I had to mention that I didnt think I was with him and he kind of gave me that 'oh darn' look. Cute. Maybe another time...

Still on the treadmill for an hour a day at least Im starting to do interval training where I go all out for a minute every 10-12 minutes. Trying to trick my body :) Not sure if my body is being tricked but its a nice change of pace.

Im tired and feel like going to bed but I cant. I have so much to do. Im afraid of taking a nap because I might not wake up until morning. Id rather do what I need to do now and get it all done before I go to bed otherwise I run the risk of not being prepared.

One day at a time :)

March 8th

Today is International Womens Day.

Its also my Sisters Birthday :)

Sister,

I love you on your Birthday and every day before but specially those that come after.

Always,
Your favorite sister :)

Dream, Fantasy, Truth or Fiction

A soft touch moving from my spine to my neck wakes me. Back and forth the motion goes. Sometimes the hand moving over my buttocks. Cupping them gently only to move back up my spine and to rest against the back of my neck. Warm, comforting and familiar.

The hand moves to my waist and stays there. I feel him move his body closer to me and then his lips press against the back of my neck. Gently sending tingles down my spine as if his hand was still in motion.

My eyes remain closed choosing to heighten the intensity. I let out a little sigh and I inhale a long breath as his lips trail from my neck down my spine and kisses the dimples on my lower back. So soft is his touch. My arms, my chest and my breasts are soon covered in goosebumps.

I turn onto my stomach and rest my cheek on the pillow. His hand are now moving down the outside of my thighs to my ankles where he pulls them apart wide. I feel exposed and open while his hands trail up the inside of my legs.

His hand reaches the apex of my thighs. He covers me and I feel the heat from his hand. His fingers softly teases my opening. Slowly increasing the pressure so he feels the heat from the inside.

He presses into me. Making me tighten around him. I lift my stomach off of the bed giving him more room to move. Hoping that he understands my silent plea. His fingers has woken up a desire in me, getting me ready for him. Moving his body above mine. I feel his fingers slip out of me.

He kisses my neck and I feel his fingers on my lips, slowly moving side to side. Making them moist, teasing my lips open like he did earlier. He slips past my lips and I take them both into my mouth. Sucking them as I imagine having something else of his in my mouth.

He pulls his fingers from my mouth and as Im opening my eyes I see him close the distance between us and kisses me. Our tongues brushing against each other. He presses himself against my opening and teases me until I lift my hips off of the bed.

Better for him so slip inside me. I wiggle a little bit and feel him pulse against me. I let out a little sigh of impatience and feel himself push into me, stretching me, filling me. I pull away from his kiss and gasp at the feeling of fullness in me.

My body doesnt move. The feeling of being complete, of being filled warps around me and I want that feeling again which is where I lower my hips to the bed and squeeze him. Its his turn to freeze and gasp. I smile, happy to hear him gasp in pleasure.

I hear him take in a deep breath and moan as he pulls away and pushes back into me. My breath comes in quicker, matching his. I rise on my elbows, my hands tightly fisted. His face buried in my neck where his mouth is open and I hear him through clenched teeth saying 'baby you feel so good. I love how wet you get.'

Hearing those words make me move my hips up and down faster, squeezing him as my hips go down. The sensation affects me as well. Making my body respond. I feel a heat throughout my body and at my center, where we are joined it coats him with my heat.

I feel every inch of him as he pushes inside me. Deep. I feel him pulling away almost all the way and again when he plunges inside. Filling me. My mouth open and me encouraging him to continue. More is what I am looking for. More of him. More of what he is doing.

His hand snakes down my arm, across my stomach and down to my clit where he finds it slick and swollen. He takes his two fingers and traps my clit in between them and rubs his fingers back and forth against me. I tense and hold my breath. his fingers continue to rub back and forth and he slows down his pace until he stops while all the way inside me. His fingers rubbing left to right.

He stays still inside me,filling me, and he feels me squeezing him as I enjoy the ripples of pleasure his fingers are giving me. My hand snakes in between my body and the bed until my hand covers his. My fingers move over his and I trap his fingers in between mine. I move my fingers making his move at the same time. I move them in a way that makes me lift my hips up and make me cry out.

Feeling me tighten around him and hearing me cry out makes him feel me open for him and lets him move in and out of me. We both feel on our hands me dripping with desire. He quickens his pace, pushing me into the bed as our fingers bring me over the edge where he soon follows.

Still inside me. He holds me so were still together lying on our sides. He tightens his fingers around mine and we pull it away from me and he brings the back of my hand to his mouth and places a kiss in the center. Bringing it back in between my breasts we lay smiling, our breathing returning to normal.

336 - free

I passed :) I'm happy and no longer dreading it because its all over and it all went well. Thanks for thinking of me if you did and if you did'nt I know you'll do so in the future sometime.
3 more weeks and Ill be finished unless something goes terribly wrong which we wont even think about will we?

Because reading BS looks strange Ill switch it to SB :) He and I were planning on getting together tonight. If he was able to leave Washington early. I was a little hesitant as I wasn''t sure if I had the tests Thurs or Fri.

I wanted to focus on that and not on other things that would really distract me and perhaps may make me late for the next day. So I told him what my schedule was like and where I needed to focus. I would have still spent time with him if he came down but not like I would have liked.

So he wasn't able to make it as the flights were all booked for the time he needed to fly OK though I had some paperwork to get done for tomorrow.

Its done. P is worried about me and my finances so hes offered to help me with them and Im unsure on how to proceed. Parts of me wants to and the other is questioning it. Im not in dire need of it but he so wants to help and It would just be too easy to take it.

I wonder...Is there anything in life thats free...

335 - nerves

There is this boy in my training class and he catches my eye. He and I are part of the 6 people who are single in a class of 30. The rest of the class has brought it upon themselves to try to set us up. I joke about it and decline the offer. Though in my head I wonder what it would be like.

I cant answer for him but theres a good back and forth banter between us. If you recall back in preschool days of pigtail pulling, shoulder punches and lots of teasing. Thats how it is with this boy. Its fun but I hope that Im not taking anything too far and actually I don't really want to be leading him on or anything as that would not be right. Were working together... or soon will be.

Training is going well. I go in a bit nervous everyday as I'm hoping that that nervousness will keep me on my toes. Ive had to do a few tests and theres a big one this Friday. Its a big one. Theres 3 part to the test and if I fail any one of them I'm not able to continue and Ill need to redo all 3 tests after X amount of time and thats the last chance that Ill get to pass it all.
So a bit nerve wracking.

I'm hoping that I wont have to do it a second time and that I get through it all the first time. Send me your good thoughts at the end of the week. Thank you.

334 - thinking

I laid my head on his chest. I wrapped my arm around him and it was perfect. We fit so well it made me smile. I felt him kiss the top of my head and I rubbed my cheek on his chest. Warm.

His hand ran up and down my arm sending tingles everywhere he touched me, making me sigh. We talked, listened and laughed and there were no tears this time. Just comfort.

I wished time stopped and we could have stayed like that forever. I wanted time to crawl. To slow and let me have him longer. I knew it wouldnt last. So I just enjoyed it all and knew that we would return to that moment another time.

We shared gentle kisses throughout our time together. Sweet and simple. I almost didnt want to let him go. Didnt want to let him get out of bed. I wanted to stay wrapped in each others arms and never let go. I smiled at that thought and just let it go. I turned and laid on my back for a moment.

Readying myself for his leaving. Instead he turned to his side and wrapped himself around me. Pressed his face into my neck and wrapped his arm and leg over me. We stayed that way for a while. My hand above and around the back of his head. Running my fingers through his hair.

We continued to talk and I calmed him down after he started talking about a tense subject. He apologized for venting. I said I didnt mind.

He left at 1am. I crawled back into bed and missed him already. Missed his warmth. I even missed holding his hand. I sent him a couple of text messages hoping he would get them in the morning. He did.

I slept thinking of him still being in bed with me. I woke up thinking the same thing.