245 - Intimate
Fri night.
Had dinner with K at my place. Thai food. One of my favorites. Caught up on a lot of things as its been a while since Ive last seen him. He wore this black dress shirt with white vertical stripes that looked very good on him. Stylish.
Spent time with The Little One. Passed along messages from my Dad in San Diego that he loves her and misses her, that shes been a great part of the family.
I had the intentions of going for groceries after work which never happened. Dont worry I am far from starving.
I walked K down and got into my car. I went to the corner store to get a bottle of water. Walked to the DQ beside the store to use the ladies room. Drove to meet D and his friend for drinks. Much fun.
A little frustrating as D and I didnt have sex at the end of the night. Even after repeated mentions of my intentions. I left 20 minutes before they did and he noticed that I was a little 'not myself'.
I didnt want to wait until they both finished their drinks so I decided to leave. I had to have some control over something, anything obviously my libido wasnt listening to me. So I decided to leave. It was almost closing time for the place anyway. Kiss for D and a quick hug for his friend.
I walked out and didnt look back. Im home and my phone rings. Its D.
D - Youre mad arent you?
Darling - No Im not mad, really. I know you wanted to but couldnt. Im not mad.
D - If this was 3 years ago.. even 2 years ago. Things would be different.
Darling - Yeah
D - I wouldnt have let you walk out of there alone. Theres no way. I wouldnt have taken you there at all. We would just head to your place.
Darling - Theres a thought :)
...
Theres something honest and vulnerable about him during the phone call. I mean I could have been wrong. But there was something there. I know I felt assured... of something. It was a nice feeling. It felt kind of like the after sex cuddle. Intimate. Thats the word.
I pick up The Little One and take her to bed with me. I talk to her and tell her everything that doesnt get voiced with anyone else. I cry. I pull her close to me and she crawls up to my face and licks the tears away. I battle with the conflict in my mind and hold her close.
We fall asleep together. I hope tomorrow doesnt come.
Had dinner with K at my place. Thai food. One of my favorites. Caught up on a lot of things as its been a while since Ive last seen him. He wore this black dress shirt with white vertical stripes that looked very good on him. Stylish.
Spent time with The Little One. Passed along messages from my Dad in San Diego that he loves her and misses her, that shes been a great part of the family.
I had the intentions of going for groceries after work which never happened. Dont worry I am far from starving.
I walked K down and got into my car. I went to the corner store to get a bottle of water. Walked to the DQ beside the store to use the ladies room. Drove to meet D and his friend for drinks. Much fun.
A little frustrating as D and I didnt have sex at the end of the night. Even after repeated mentions of my intentions. I left 20 minutes before they did and he noticed that I was a little 'not myself'.
I didnt want to wait until they both finished their drinks so I decided to leave. I had to have some control over something, anything obviously my libido wasnt listening to me. So I decided to leave. It was almost closing time for the place anyway. Kiss for D and a quick hug for his friend.
I walked out and didnt look back. Im home and my phone rings. Its D.
D - Youre mad arent you?
Darling - No Im not mad, really. I know you wanted to but couldnt. Im not mad.
D - If this was 3 years ago.. even 2 years ago. Things would be different.
Darling - Yeah
D - I wouldnt have let you walk out of there alone. Theres no way. I wouldnt have taken you there at all. We would just head to your place.
Darling - Theres a thought :)
...
Theres something honest and vulnerable about him during the phone call. I mean I could have been wrong. But there was something there. I know I felt assured... of something. It was a nice feeling. It felt kind of like the after sex cuddle. Intimate. Thats the word.
I pick up The Little One and take her to bed with me. I talk to her and tell her everything that doesnt get voiced with anyone else. I cry. I pull her close to me and she crawls up to my face and licks the tears away. I battle with the conflict in my mind and hold her close.
We fall asleep together. I hope tomorrow doesnt come.
Labels: animals, bar, Bummed, convos, Happenings, moments, pets, phone
posted by darling @ 8:56 AM
4 Comments:
At July 18, 2007 12:58 AM,
Scotty said…
D really confuses me.
At July 18, 2007 9:51 AM,
darling said…
Hi Scotty, As long as its not just me :) In a way. I think its a good thing that I dont have him pegged. That I dont know what to expect.
If I did know what to expect. If I wasnt confused. Then I wouldnt want to continue to figure out the puzzle? Does that make sense?
Im not the greatest at relationships and sometimes I think I know less about men than I like to imagine.
:)
At July 18, 2007 12:51 PM,
Scotty said…
I dont think I would be one to try and figure out any confusion.
A little bit of mystery, however, entirely different.
Just seems like he's one way one minute, then something else the next minute. I dunno.
At July 18, 2007 2:50 PM,
darling said…
Hi Scotty, I like puzzles and mystery for sure. Maybe I used the wrong word? Maybe its a bit of both as Im still as intrigued as if I had just met someone new.
Definately one way then the other sometimes.
Post a Comment
<< Home