202 - racks

In a post coital conversation with D last night. We've determined that the more sex we have the more we want it. In general of course. I didn't want to scare him off with my libidinous nature that seems to have cropped up from somewhere. Though I think he has an inkling about this certain nature of mine and quite likes it.

As I do, I dissect.

I will now sound like a loony when I talk about whether hes just in it for sex for him or sex for me. I know that he climaxes, that's pretty evident. I wonder if he can climax twice or thrice. I wonder if its just about getting off for him. He also enjoys making sure that I climax. We've had the conversation of 'its all about pleasure and if there is something I'm not doing right tell me and if there is anything that you want to try let me know' (his words... I echoed it though I wanted to add that's its more than pleasure. Its also about growing learning and experimenting and of course connecting) .. though that sounds like I want a relationship.

I'm thinking this as if it was in fact just a friends with benefits kind of arrangement then the texts and phone calls throughout the day is unnecessary. That the reason people call someone is because of interest. If there were no interest then there would be no reason to call.

*Darling pulls out a rose and slowly peels petals off one by one. Hes interested.. hes not interested.. hes interested... hes not interested. I have 3 roses from last night. Much petal to peel.

I'm so not a dater. I don't know the rules if there are any if I'm doing something I'm not supposed to and what not. At some point I will ask him what we are just to clarify things and find out that's its not what I was thinking and Ill end up with a stiletto clad foot in my mouth. I just do what I can, go out with who I want to see, when I can fit it in my schedule.

You only live once. Go for it.

Early evening as I am getting ready for B to arrive when D calls and I'm a Little nervous. I'm not sure why but I have a feeling its to do with me seeing B in less that 15 minutes and knowing that Ill be with D later on. I'm pretty open and very honest and so I find myself keeping to that and after telling him that I was seeing someone that same night. There was an obvious shift in tone and conversation.

I'm not sure what I expected. Probably that. The worse thing that could have happened was that he say hes not cool with that and that he never wants to hear from me again. That didn't happen. Instead he said that he wasn't into that. (Think sloppy seconds) I assured him that there has never been a time that I was sloppy and for his information and if it makes him feel better. There was no sex planned with B.

Still the tone was different and I was kind of sad and disappointed. How was I supposed to react? Hes not my boyfriend. Its just sex and friendship. Hes known that I go on dates and I go out with other people. Who knows what all that's about

Confession...I know this post doesn't make me look good. I'm not sure if I am doing myself any favors by being so open about things. Its just, well, its my life. I'm not sure if I'm living it 100% or not but I am aware of whats happening it in and make the most of it. Its an experience and I'm an experience junky.

So D says he might not want to come over as planned. WTF?! I don't understand men. I thought I did, but something happens that makes me think that I know less than I thought I did. D told me once. Men are pigs, men wont say no to sex. Hmmmm did he just say no to sex? Methinks he did.

Pool with my sister and TGirl. Placed in the middle. Surrounded by other tables who conveniently were taken up by... you guessed it , those of the opposite sex. What a night to wear a dress with no panties. You can bet those shots that needed one leg lifted along the table didn't all go in because

A. I didn't bother trying?
B. I'm just that bad a pool player.
C. The breeze gave me a chill at the most inopportune time.

I lost count of how many times we racked the balls. Now TGirl and my sister thought it was being done on purpose so that I would flirt with the boys around us. What was being done on purpose? Balls flying off the table only to roll to someone of the opposite sex. This hindered the game much and after the fourth time it happened, the guy who picked up my ball mentioned that I must be doing it on purpose. He suggested that he give me lessons and I walked away saying that the last offer I had was better and that he should come up with something better.

Learned a lot about TGirl and here's a conversation with TGirl after a few Martinis :)

TGirl to my sister Is she wearing a bra tonight?

Sister She has all the boobs in the family, ask her

TGirl (across the pool table) Darling are you wearing a bra?

Darling (blush) No, why?

TGirl Really? They look good, how do they stay so perky?

Sister Exercises

TGirl Show me

Sister does a quick demo

I laugh as Ive hardly done those exercises though I should. They will help preserve the 'perkiness'

Meanwhile there are a couple of tables that have stopped playing and have been following the conversation. Lovely. Now we have a bigger audience.

Close to midnight we head out and I'm dropped off at my place, more than nicely buzzed I take the dogs out for a walk and call my sister to let her know her keys were in my purse. They return and TGirl sees both dogs for the first time. We plan on going out again another time.

I dial up D and let him know that I am home and that he doesn't have to pick me up anymore. I ask him if hes planning on coming over and he says yes. I ask if hes been thinking about it all night. He says yes. I'm not sure which I was I was asking about, Whether he was thinking of me and B and what we might have done or if hes been thinking about what will happen when HE comes over. He says yes Ive been thinking about seeing you all night. What a charmer.

When he arrives, as usual its a flurry of activity. Bodies twisting and bending for self and mutual satisfaction. Fingers stroke and caress together and on their own. Breathless whispers at the nape of my neck and my moans are heard. Skin slapping against each other is felt and heard. A quick flip and were wrapped in each others arms holding on tight until we find a rhythm that brings about orgasms.

Men really cant say no to sex... Could you? Would you?